my dirty little secrets.
Saturday, August 30, 2003
wenta train early in e morning.
met cindy outside sch bus-stop.
hmm.den went to botanic gnds.
actuallie still have hweeyi n liting.
but both din turned up.
so left e 2 of us only..running..
yepp.weather kinda hot.
jogged fr tanglin mall dere 2 SMU
1.2km.but dunoe y seemed rather long le.
n i jay-walked twice.almost kana knock down.
but perhaps its better.rather den continue livin in misery...
tk a break n walked baq.
n we talked n talked.
sumtimes tokin to her juz make me drift kayy.
so farr.reli far..
can fr track 2 council 2 hse.
when it doesnt even seem to haf any linkage.
yeahh.al least we tok.better den stone.haha.
i juz seemed to haf so much to sae.
wanted to let everytg out juz one short.
but juz things i din dare to sae.
afraid to mk her worried.
n wld only mk me feel hurt n i will break down.
seriously din wan tt 2 happen.
or at least nt in front of her..
*sighh* still gt lotsa stuff on my mind.
e trip to b.g only mk me drift further.
n enter deeper thots.lettin me noe its all my fault fr e start.
uhh.life totalie sucks.i reli donoe y.
e sudden change in me...
juz dun lyte how it feels rite nw.
juzz seem as tho every single soul has changed.
attitude wise.n others.
life was meant 2 b beautifull.at perhaps.nt meant fer me..
*wails*
went macs to eat..den went baq hm.
saw ry at redhill havin guides.uhmm.
e journey on e train was mysteriously longg.
everytime i looked at my watch.only 1 min passed.
but it fellt so freag long kayy.
doenoe y larhh.i juz drifted agn.sighh.
everytime i tink of tis juz mk me feel worst only.
mk me feel tt all these werent supose to happen.
e reason behind it.yet.i still.do not noe..
den y is this going to e drain?
its shud b healing? perhaps it is 2 her..?
reli dunnoe laa.juz so horrid only.
n it feels like so uhh.dot lorh..wadever kae.
juz crappin awae.no one listens to my troubles...
went 2 holland v fer lunch.
den to haagen dias 4 desert.
yumyum.so yummy.
e ice cream so bang.but veh ex.
so can only go dere when gt voucher.
uh-huh.came hm.
n i started muggin.wanted to do better.
realised i din reli do well fer CA2
wth..i wasnt supposed to slack.
i wasnt supposed to let tis affect me..
n yet.all haf proven me wrong.
i juz gotta study harder i guess.
n do better in SA2 lorh.
its all over.n i guess deres ntg i cld eva do..
hmmm.i wanted to b gd in my studies.
n nw.i've let myself down.
time n time agn.i nv failed to let myself down.
*sigh* i dun seem 2 b gd in anytg at all.
studies? track? council? hse?
wads e point of bring committed when in e end.ntg gets to u?
e credit always goes 2 sumone else when it wasnt meant to b..
so unfair.but dun seem 2 b able to do anytg at all.
heck lahh.no one bothers.
juz hafta gif up my precious.sighh.no fair at all.
dun ever tink i can cope.all crammped in my punne head.
bahh..woahh.im nt as pro..sobs.
haiyohs.dunno wadda sae.only noe life sux full time.
wow wow wow.so amazing.
im crappin away.as usual.heehee.rubbishy me lahh.*tsk*
ltr going happy pAY.yay.my sis gt craving.
n its supposed to b my bdae celebration in advance.
cos i wun b free next time.
most probably bz muggin lorh.
no one wld b der to celebrate it wif me
so guess gt no surprises la...
found out tt i've been eatin alot.
dunno if i was reli hungry or juz de-stressin lah
yeshh.juz thot im too stress.cant cope wif e activities i haf kaex.
sigh.lets tk ydae 4 eg.
e hoole dae i ate:
-bread[breakfast]
-cake+hashbrown+nugget[recess]
-bowl of prawn mee[lunch]
-bowl of fried rice[lunch]
-5 fishballs[lunch]
-1 bottle justtea[lunch]
-2 cups gasy drink[lunch]
-5 bars/pkts chocolates[teatime]
-1 plate white rice[dinner]
-1 plate fried rice[dinner]
-a bowl of soup[dinner]
-half a pear[dinner]
-1 banana[dinner]
hahahahaha.how great can i ged lorh.
n so lame listin everytg out.
n still dun put on weight.wth.
wadever lah.eatin doesnt do me any gd.
mebbe ONE DAE will b lk e holland v e wanwan.
yeshh.doenoe lar.
den ltr will still haf buffet
n juz force evrytg down my stomach n intestines lorh.ahha. *winks*
kinda decided.
nt to let anytg out liao.
juz continue kp-ing to myself.
den smile more.n ple wun misunderstand.
no worries no troubles.lynette juz a carefree gurl once agn.
heehee. =) tis is so true wadd.
den overheard tis sec 2 councillor sayin tt i lok damn stern.
nv smile at all.lyte veh fierce liddat.
ahaha.dey advised me to lk more cheerful.
den more chio.ha.
dun ever tink i will b able 2 acomplished tt ever agn.
till tis ends.life will nv b e same agn.
sumtimes juz ponder if i reli lk veh bu shuang when i dun smile le..?
erts.so true so true.
no wonder so freag many ple misunderstood me.
waokaoo.so i finally gound e truth lah.hehx.
wadever lah.dun gif a damn.
i shall juz continue havin hellalot of rubbishy... 'troubles'
uhh.no no no.swear to b happie.yesh.i must.cant let myslef nor anyone down agn.
lets see if this can be done.lalala.so dead.mmmm.....
-even if sumone doesnt treat u wif e respect u deserve,u can gif em e respect dey dun-
met cindy outside sch bus-stop.
hmm.den went to botanic gnds.
actuallie still have hweeyi n liting.
but both din turned up.
so left e 2 of us only..running..
yepp.weather kinda hot.
jogged fr tanglin mall dere 2 SMU
1.2km.but dunoe y seemed rather long le.
n i jay-walked twice.almost kana knock down.
but perhaps its better.rather den continue livin in misery...
tk a break n walked baq.
n we talked n talked.
sumtimes tokin to her juz make me drift kayy.
so farr.reli far..
can fr track 2 council 2 hse.
when it doesnt even seem to haf any linkage.
yeahh.al least we tok.better den stone.haha.
i juz seemed to haf so much to sae.
wanted to let everytg out juz one short.
but juz things i din dare to sae.
afraid to mk her worried.
n wld only mk me feel hurt n i will break down.
seriously din wan tt 2 happen.
or at least nt in front of her..
*sighh* still gt lotsa stuff on my mind.
e trip to b.g only mk me drift further.
n enter deeper thots.lettin me noe its all my fault fr e start.
uhh.life totalie sucks.i reli donoe y.
e sudden change in me...
juz dun lyte how it feels rite nw.
juzz seem as tho every single soul has changed.
attitude wise.n others.
life was meant 2 b beautifull.at perhaps.nt meant fer me..
*wails*
went macs to eat..den went baq hm.
saw ry at redhill havin guides.uhmm.
e journey on e train was mysteriously longg.
everytime i looked at my watch.only 1 min passed.
but it fellt so freag long kayy.
doenoe y larhh.i juz drifted agn.sighh.
everytime i tink of tis juz mk me feel worst only.
mk me feel tt all these werent supose to happen.
e reason behind it.yet.i still.do not noe..
den y is this going to e drain?
its shud b healing? perhaps it is 2 her..?
reli dunnoe laa.juz so horrid only.
n it feels like so uhh.dot lorh..wadever kae.
juz crappin awae.no one listens to my troubles...
went 2 holland v fer lunch.
den to haagen dias 4 desert.
yumyum.so yummy.
e ice cream so bang.but veh ex.
so can only go dere when gt voucher.
uh-huh.came hm.
n i started muggin.wanted to do better.
realised i din reli do well fer CA2
wth..i wasnt supposed to slack.
i wasnt supposed to let tis affect me..
n yet.all haf proven me wrong.
i juz gotta study harder i guess.
n do better in SA2 lorh.
its all over.n i guess deres ntg i cld eva do..
hmmm.i wanted to b gd in my studies.
n nw.i've let myself down.
time n time agn.i nv failed to let myself down.
*sigh* i dun seem 2 b gd in anytg at all.
studies? track? council? hse?
wads e point of bring committed when in e end.ntg gets to u?
e credit always goes 2 sumone else when it wasnt meant to b..
so unfair.but dun seem 2 b able to do anytg at all.
heck lahh.no one bothers.
juz hafta gif up my precious.sighh.no fair at all.
dun ever tink i can cope.all crammped in my punne head.
bahh..woahh.im nt as pro..sobs.
haiyohs.dunno wadda sae.only noe life sux full time.
wow wow wow.so amazing.
im crappin away.as usual.heehee.rubbishy me lahh.*tsk*
ltr going happy pAY.yay.my sis gt craving.
n its supposed to b my bdae celebration in advance.
cos i wun b free next time.
most probably bz muggin lorh.
no one wld b der to celebrate it wif me
so guess gt no surprises la...
found out tt i've been eatin alot.
dunno if i was reli hungry or juz de-stressin lah
yeshh.juz thot im too stress.cant cope wif e activities i haf kaex.
sigh.lets tk ydae 4 eg.
e hoole dae i ate:
-bread[breakfast]
-cake+hashbrown+nugget[recess]
-bowl of prawn mee[lunch]
-bowl of fried rice[lunch]
-5 fishballs[lunch]
-1 bottle justtea[lunch]
-2 cups gasy drink[lunch]
-5 bars/pkts chocolates[teatime]
-1 plate white rice[dinner]
-1 plate fried rice[dinner]
-a bowl of soup[dinner]
-half a pear[dinner]
-1 banana[dinner]
hahahahaha.how great can i ged lorh.
n so lame listin everytg out.
n still dun put on weight.wth.
wadever lah.eatin doesnt do me any gd.
mebbe ONE DAE will b lk e holland v e wanwan.
yeshh.doenoe lar.
den ltr will still haf buffet
n juz force evrytg down my stomach n intestines lorh.ahha. *winks*
kinda decided.
nt to let anytg out liao.
juz continue kp-ing to myself.
den smile more.n ple wun misunderstand.
no worries no troubles.lynette juz a carefree gurl once agn.
heehee. =) tis is so true wadd.
den overheard tis sec 2 councillor sayin tt i lok damn stern.
nv smile at all.lyte veh fierce liddat.
ahaha.dey advised me to lk more cheerful.
den more chio.ha.
dun ever tink i will b able 2 acomplished tt ever agn.
till tis ends.life will nv b e same agn.
sumtimes juz ponder if i reli lk veh bu shuang when i dun smile le..?
erts.so true so true.
no wonder so freag many ple misunderstood me.
waokaoo.so i finally gound e truth lah.hehx.
wadever lah.dun gif a damn.
i shall juz continue havin hellalot of rubbishy... 'troubles'
uhh.no no no.swear to b happie.yesh.i must.cant let myslef nor anyone down agn.
lets see if this can be done.lalala.so dead.mmmm.....
-even if sumone doesnt treat u wif e respect u deserve,u can gif em e respect dey dun-
the girl next door;
Friday, August 29, 2003
had t'cherrs dae celebration+aces day+hse election
yeahh.trained wif cindy in e mornin
was kinda moody larhh.yepps.
she brought me 2 sumwhere.
claimed wanted 2 c her ex-class.
u gd larhh.juz pao qi wo.sighh.
mk me feel so freag gan ga.i reli duno wadda sae.
sry i ran away.i din wana stay dere any longer.
afraid i break down larhh.
so worried kayy.sorrie.tho i said i wld return.
yepps.i reli din noe how on earth i was feeling la.
kick-boxing was fun tho..
yeshh.was sorta enjoyin myself.mwahaha.
punch till so hard.sorta ventin my stressness.
uh-huhx.fooled arnd.den drifted awae.n started thinkin.
uhmmm.kinda sad.n worried too.
sir kept lookin at me.giving me tt look.
n i found i wad he was tryin to sae..
haiks.my life sucks can?
had hse election after tt.
wasnt happy i was nominated at all.
sum ple juz dun understand how nz n stressful i am..
totallie gt plently of things to cope wif.
n yet.still gt hse sia.
wad is this lorh.so tsk.haiyohs. :(
i told me classmates nt to vote fer me.
cos i wld still gif up aniwae..
yepps.exactly..i muz haf a choice in me.
tho u all may believe i haf e ability to do it larh.
but cant.veh stressed.far too many things on my mind.
gt council n track.gd enuff larh.
perhaps u all juz dun understand me kayy.
this hole thing mk me so fan e hole dae.
waokaox.so irritating.
den sir muz go tok to me durin recess.mk me feel worst only wadd.
but nt tt bad lar.he juz wanted me to mk a rite choice.
ionly haf myslef to blame.me me n me larh.
nt gd enuff to b a fren of hers.*sigh* saddening.
wth.yeahh.
heyy.thanks fer e rose.so sweet of u.
e concert was fairly enjoyable larh.
its wasnt tt badd huh?
had to escort this tcher.
whom i din noe hu lorhh.
but tink she is nice larhh.ms chua i tink.
yepps.hadta sit bside all e upper sec.
mk me feel chao xtra.
wanted to go baw 2 my class asap.
heehee :)
e concert was delayed 4 45mins.
ahh.so freag long.still gt ttrack celebration.
but ponn tt in e end.
everyone waitin fer me den juz left lorh.
yeshh.reched rgp quite late l;arhh.
managed to watch e concert.but nt as nice.
cos i wasnt e one who organised it.
mwhahah.past 2 yrs e prefectorial board always in charge.
hehe. -egoistic- hehe. tt's moi! -winks-
felt kinda sian todae at rgp.
dunoe y.e enthu me juz wasnt me.yeaa.
felt kinda troubled.n was tinkin abt wad happened earlier.
met e tchers.n had e prawn mee.
missed it so muchh.so nicee.hah.
wif lotsa chilli.mk me burn my mouth.
hahaa.so bang..den ate fried rice summore.
sucha great eater lorh.teeheehe :)
roamed abt e sch.met lotsa ple.
all changed .hahaa.cldnt recognise certain.hee.
played netball.supposed havent lost my skills uh?
mwahaha.juniors rmbered me.hee.so honoured.
tokin crap larhh.oh wells.tt juz me..
realised i havent reli changed much.
my classmates say i still lk e same.
n tt ry muz kp sayin i changed alot lorh.
like woahh wadd.its nt as if ple dun change seriously..
i shrank.haha.so shortie nw.*grins*
ms tan wasnt arnd in rgp.ahh.wanted to lk fer her kayy.
*sighh*wadeverlarh.at least managed to meet up wif me clasmates rite..
heehee.den went home wif ee wen lorhh.
was veh bored.n wanted to leave rgp early.yesnhh.
juz drifting awae larhh.
feel tt im e cause to like every single thing in this world.
im so shi-bai kayy.
*sighh*dun like this feeling rite nw..
when it seems as tho as din care.
still so carefree.n uhh.yepps.i dunoe wadda sae agnn......
-frenship wif oneself is all-important bcos wifout it,one cant b frens wif anyone else in e world-
yeahh.trained wif cindy in e mornin
was kinda moody larhh.yepps.
she brought me 2 sumwhere.
claimed wanted 2 c her ex-class.
u gd larhh.juz pao qi wo.sighh.
mk me feel so freag gan ga.i reli duno wadda sae.
sry i ran away.i din wana stay dere any longer.
afraid i break down larhh.
so worried kayy.sorrie.tho i said i wld return.
yepps.i reli din noe how on earth i was feeling la.
kick-boxing was fun tho..
yeshh.was sorta enjoyin myself.mwahaha.
punch till so hard.sorta ventin my stressness.
uh-huhx.fooled arnd.den drifted awae.n started thinkin.
uhmmm.kinda sad.n worried too.
sir kept lookin at me.giving me tt look.
n i found i wad he was tryin to sae..
haiks.my life sucks can?
had hse election after tt.
wasnt happy i was nominated at all.
sum ple juz dun understand how nz n stressful i am..
totallie gt plently of things to cope wif.
n yet.still gt hse sia.
wad is this lorh.so tsk.haiyohs. :(
i told me classmates nt to vote fer me.
cos i wld still gif up aniwae..
yepps.exactly..i muz haf a choice in me.
tho u all may believe i haf e ability to do it larh.
but cant.veh stressed.far too many things on my mind.
gt council n track.gd enuff larh.
perhaps u all juz dun understand me kayy.
this hole thing mk me so fan e hole dae.
waokaox.so irritating.
den sir muz go tok to me durin recess.mk me feel worst only wadd.
but nt tt bad lar.he juz wanted me to mk a rite choice.
ionly haf myslef to blame.me me n me larh.
nt gd enuff to b a fren of hers.*sigh* saddening.
wth.yeahh.
heyy.thanks fer e rose.so sweet of u.
e concert was fairly enjoyable larh.
its wasnt tt badd huh?
had to escort this tcher.
whom i din noe hu lorhh.
but tink she is nice larhh.ms chua i tink.
yepps.hadta sit bside all e upper sec.
mk me feel chao xtra.
wanted to go baw 2 my class asap.
heehee :)
e concert was delayed 4 45mins.
ahh.so freag long.still gt ttrack celebration.
but ponn tt in e end.
everyone waitin fer me den juz left lorh.
yeshh.reched rgp quite late l;arhh.
managed to watch e concert.but nt as nice.
cos i wasnt e one who organised it.
mwhahah.past 2 yrs e prefectorial board always in charge.
hehe. -egoistic- hehe. tt's moi! -winks-
felt kinda sian todae at rgp.
dunoe y.e enthu me juz wasnt me.yeaa.
felt kinda troubled.n was tinkin abt wad happened earlier.
met e tchers.n had e prawn mee.
missed it so muchh.so nicee.hah.
wif lotsa chilli.mk me burn my mouth.
hahaa.so bang..den ate fried rice summore.
sucha great eater lorh.teeheehe :)
roamed abt e sch.met lotsa ple.
all changed .hahaa.cldnt recognise certain.hee.
played netball.supposed havent lost my skills uh?
mwahaha.juniors rmbered me.hee.so honoured.
tokin crap larhh.oh wells.tt juz me..
realised i havent reli changed much.
my classmates say i still lk e same.
n tt ry muz kp sayin i changed alot lorh.
like woahh wadd.its nt as if ple dun change seriously..
i shrank.haha.so shortie nw.*grins*
ms tan wasnt arnd in rgp.ahh.wanted to lk fer her kayy.
*sighh*wadeverlarh.at least managed to meet up wif me clasmates rite..
heehee.den went home wif ee wen lorhh.
was veh bored.n wanted to leave rgp early.yesnhh.
juz drifting awae larhh.
feel tt im e cause to like every single thing in this world.
im so shi-bai kayy.
*sighh*dun like this feeling rite nw..
when it seems as tho as din care.
still so carefree.n uhh.yepps.i dunoe wadda sae agnn......
-frenship wif oneself is all-important bcos wifout it,one cant b frens wif anyone else in e world-
the girl next door;
Sunday, August 24, 2003
went thru yining senior auto bk.
came across this poem.
thot waas quite meaningful.
yepps.kinda implies me.wadever la.
nw gt time.juz share it wif u ple.
[-i somtimes felt tt im drifting
thru this life wifout effect
i often wonder if im truly
worth wad i've been blessed
i search thru days tt haf been hard
2 try 2 understand
e many trials tt i've known
e life tt i've had
u see me in my daily grinds
so confident n strong;
yet when im alone,i question
where i belong
i often try too hard i find
2 analyse n guess
2 scrutinize,investigate
my life i will confess
4 sumwhere deeper. i must b
e meaning to tis life
sumwae 2 make a difference
gif a reason fer tis strife
is dere sum hidden meaning?
sum agenda 2 be found?
its greater purpose waiting
if i care to hang arnd
it teases n taunts me
alwaes slightly out of sight
it hazy vision out of reach
where darkness hides e light
i stuggle to bring clarity
2 wad awaits me dere
n yet this weak illusion
always fade b4 my stare
it seems e harder tt i try
2 focus thru e haze
juz serves 2 add more qns
thru my endless, tired gaze
perhaps im tryin juz too hard
2 underdstand it all
fer can we ever truly noe
juz wad we haf in store?
each incidednt each moment passed
juz adds upon e next
but in e end will i find e truth
or will i b perplexed?
perhaps i mk it harder
dan it has 2 b sumtimes
but will my searching bring me
my meaning over time?
or will it leave me broken
n confused as i feel nw
while qns bring no solitude
to this, my wrinkled brow-]
no one reli understand how i reli feel.
n evertime i haf a smile on my face.
ple doubt me.say i shudnt hide my feelings.
dun kp it inside.
no one reli belives me.
n claim i wear a mask.
n when i feel sad.u call me to cheer up.
say i lok better when i smile.
so i juz wonder.wad ple reli wan from me
a smile or a frown?
wadever it is.i can only be myself.
n nt put on any form of act or mask.
but sumtimes, im juz obliged to.
im sorry fer mking u 2 go thru tis wif me.
i enjoyed ur company.
i reli did.thanks fer ur concern.
but juz to say.i dun wan u 2 to ged involved.
but still.thankiew.*hugs* =)
came across this poem.
thot waas quite meaningful.
yepps.kinda implies me.wadever la.
nw gt time.juz share it wif u ple.
[-i somtimes felt tt im drifting
thru this life wifout effect
i often wonder if im truly
worth wad i've been blessed
i search thru days tt haf been hard
2 try 2 understand
e many trials tt i've known
e life tt i've had
u see me in my daily grinds
so confident n strong;
yet when im alone,i question
where i belong
i often try too hard i find
2 analyse n guess
2 scrutinize,investigate
my life i will confess
4 sumwhere deeper. i must b
e meaning to tis life
sumwae 2 make a difference
gif a reason fer tis strife
is dere sum hidden meaning?
sum agenda 2 be found?
its greater purpose waiting
if i care to hang arnd
it teases n taunts me
alwaes slightly out of sight
it hazy vision out of reach
where darkness hides e light
i stuggle to bring clarity
2 wad awaits me dere
n yet this weak illusion
always fade b4 my stare
it seems e harder tt i try
2 focus thru e haze
juz serves 2 add more qns
thru my endless, tired gaze
perhaps im tryin juz too hard
2 underdstand it all
fer can we ever truly noe
juz wad we haf in store?
each incidednt each moment passed
juz adds upon e next
but in e end will i find e truth
or will i b perplexed?
perhaps i mk it harder
dan it has 2 b sumtimes
but will my searching bring me
my meaning over time?
or will it leave me broken
n confused as i feel nw
while qns bring no solitude
to this, my wrinkled brow-]
no one reli understand how i reli feel.
n evertime i haf a smile on my face.
ple doubt me.say i shudnt hide my feelings.
dun kp it inside.
no one reli belives me.
n claim i wear a mask.
n when i feel sad.u call me to cheer up.
say i lok better when i smile.
so i juz wonder.wad ple reli wan from me
a smile or a frown?
wadever it is.i can only be myself.
n nt put on any form of act or mask.
but sumtimes, im juz obliged to.
im sorry fer mking u 2 go thru tis wif me.
i enjoyed ur company.
i reli did.thanks fer ur concern.
but juz to say.i dun wan u 2 to ged involved.
but still.thankiew.*hugs* =)
the girl next door;
Saturday, August 23, 2003
todae so funn.AAW,.woahh.once in a lifetime wadd.
its simple cool kayy.enjoyed myself so much.
heeheee.
ferst thing i step into class.
saw evryone bz tieing their bandanas.
but in e end.no one reli wore it throughtout e entire day.
so freagin hot kayy.perspire like siaoo.
n dey kp commentin tt i look like milk-maid wif bandana.
woahh lorh.nt insultin at all wad.*tsktsk*
went down 2 parade square.
yepps.gt my hair sprayed blue..n gt glitter.
hah.looks quite presentable larh.or at least i hope so.
den roamed arnd wif ys.
at ferst started wif this whole gang of 1C2 girls.
den in e end.left me n her only.hahaz.
serene help me mk e glitter tatto thingy.
heh.thanks arh.tho she kinda ruined my right hand.
n even said i muz b hounoured to let her do.haah.
spent hellalot of money kayy.
tink a total of $25 bucks.
mytian.so much kayy.on sum sort of useless stuff.
hehe.crap larhh.
saw many of my juniors.yepps.
dey said my looks changed lotsa
reli meh?if tt's true den tink i prefer e present lynette
but in terms of behaviour.*sigh*im utterly speechless.
yeahh.AAW totally rawks man.hahaha.
gt my hand done too!heena.so chio.
haha.everytg is chio to me larh. *grins*
aft walkin abt 3 hrs.was tired out..
so went baw to class.enjoy e wonderful air con.
harhar.so shuang.refreshing larhh.
den toko a few fotos.
wif yx n jamie.haha.cute larhh.
den ry called.so we decided to join her at orchard
yepx.n yx n i totalie din noe how to go..
whohc stop to alight.woahh.-shi bai.s-
mwahahaha.btu gt to heeren eventually.
met up wif ry.krys.rb.jas n jocelyn.
yepps.jocelyn so poor thing.
haf to pluck out 4 teeth to put her braces.
hah.but its alritex.its usual
only abnormal ple like me dun nd to pull any teeth out kayy
hahaah.den went to take neoprint.
haha.chio chio chio.
but i went to ruin e pic.haha.nt tt bad larhh.hehhe.
n i gt complimented fer cuttin to straight. +ego+
fine danty.hahaha,crapp.
den yx n i went of fer lunch.
e rest went to roam abt at heeren i supose.
ate kfc.den i ate crepe.cheap.$1 only.haah.
den we oso roamed arnd.but met up wif krys n ry ferst larh
met june.ethel.yilin.n others at heeren too.
nt forgettin liping.liting.n joan.
haha.den bought sum chio rubber bands.wif yx.
haha.its so nicee.hehe.blue.purple.pink.haha.nice kayy.
walked e hole of heeren.so tired aft tt.
din noe heeren so beeg.yessh.almost die-ed.hehx.*winks*
left abt 3.30pm.went somerset mrt.
almots gt lost kayy.haah.no sense of direction.
waited fer e train.took so long.n its was so packed.
we tried squeezin in.yeaps. =)
long jorney...wanted to sleep.veh lethargic.
todae's one dae.i'll never foget. :)
n i started to drift awayyy...........................
havin a bad headache rite nw.
thinkin far too hard.im far too presurrized.
arghh.den head so itchy summore.arghs!
-Friends stick by u no matter wad.
dey dun judge u,dey dun make rules abt u.
dey accept u fer who u are.
u shud value friendship abv any'tg else,
bcos if u dun haf fwens,u dun haf any'tg else-
its simple cool kayy.enjoyed myself so much.
heeheee.
ferst thing i step into class.
saw evryone bz tieing their bandanas.
but in e end.no one reli wore it throughtout e entire day.
so freagin hot kayy.perspire like siaoo.
n dey kp commentin tt i look like milk-maid wif bandana.
woahh lorh.nt insultin at all wad.*tsktsk*
went down 2 parade square.
yepps.gt my hair sprayed blue..n gt glitter.
hah.looks quite presentable larh.or at least i hope so.
den roamed arnd wif ys.
at ferst started wif this whole gang of 1C2 girls.
den in e end.left me n her only.hahaz.
serene help me mk e glitter tatto thingy.
heh.thanks arh.tho she kinda ruined my right hand.
n even said i muz b hounoured to let her do.haah.
spent hellalot of money kayy.
tink a total of $25 bucks.
mytian.so much kayy.on sum sort of useless stuff.
hehe.crap larhh.
saw many of my juniors.yepps.
dey said my looks changed lotsa
reli meh?if tt's true den tink i prefer e present lynette
but in terms of behaviour.*sigh*im utterly speechless.
yeahh.AAW totally rawks man.hahaha.
gt my hand done too!heena.so chio.
haha.everytg is chio to me larh. *grins*
aft walkin abt 3 hrs.was tired out..
so went baw to class.enjoy e wonderful air con.
harhar.so shuang.refreshing larhh.
den toko a few fotos.
wif yx n jamie.haha.cute larhh.
den ry called.so we decided to join her at orchard
yepx.n yx n i totalie din noe how to go..
whohc stop to alight.woahh.-shi bai.s-
mwahahaha.btu gt to heeren eventually.
met up wif ry.krys.rb.jas n jocelyn.
yepps.jocelyn so poor thing.
haf to pluck out 4 teeth to put her braces.
hah.but its alritex.its usual
only abnormal ple like me dun nd to pull any teeth out kayy
hahaah.den went to take neoprint.
haha.chio chio chio.
but i went to ruin e pic.haha.nt tt bad larhh.hehhe.
n i gt complimented fer cuttin to straight. +ego+
fine danty.hahaha,crapp.
den yx n i went of fer lunch.
e rest went to roam abt at heeren i supose.
ate kfc.den i ate crepe.cheap.$1 only.haah.
den we oso roamed arnd.but met up wif krys n ry ferst larh
met june.ethel.yilin.n others at heeren too.
nt forgettin liping.liting.n joan.
haha.den bought sum chio rubber bands.wif yx.
haha.its so nicee.hehe.blue.purple.pink.haha.nice kayy.
walked e hole of heeren.so tired aft tt.
din noe heeren so beeg.yessh.almost die-ed.hehx.*winks*
left abt 3.30pm.went somerset mrt.
almots gt lost kayy.haah.no sense of direction.
waited fer e train.took so long.n its was so packed.
we tried squeezin in.yeaps. =)
long jorney...wanted to sleep.veh lethargic.
todae's one dae.i'll never foget. :)
n i started to drift awayyy...........................
havin a bad headache rite nw.
thinkin far too hard.im far too presurrized.
arghh.den head so itchy summore.arghs!
-Friends stick by u no matter wad.
dey dun judge u,dey dun make rules abt u.
dey accept u fer who u are.
u shud value friendship abv any'tg else,
bcos if u dun haf fwens,u dun haf any'tg else-
the girl next door;
Friday, August 22, 2003
yest trng was like.so uhmm lorhh.
sir's trng.wells.wasnt tt bad.
but juz rather tiring larhh.
he told us muz do 8 sets.
run canal.den jump over bench.crawl under table.
rowing.push-ups.den fitness corner.
almost die-ed half way thru.
n the bloody sun was fregin hot ydae.
n noo break summore.wth.
gt no partner.heh.juz a loner.
roamin abt.haha.wadever..
al2gether did 8 sets.
5 proper one.den e last 3 juz ran canal.
came baq.everyone doin cool down.
hphffff.im so dumbb.erts!
haiks.how follish can i ged.pl onli do 5 sets lorh.
stupid me lar.forever oso liddat.
sighh.juz take it as improvin my fitness lorh.
ran canal alone.mk me drift further only.hah.
yepps.wad if i dropped into e canal.
den can juz die over dere.yepp.no one nd to care.
den went home wif yx.krys.sarina.ry.n.. tt all.
ate ice cream.yeahh.
den we din wana board e train.quite packed.
sarina so cute.was lyk how cum we nv go up e train arh?
said tt onli after e door was abt to close.
mwahahaha.made all of us laugh like siao lorh.
haha.she dun like rgps.haha.nemind.its nice okie?
went home.did maths.den slept.was tired.
gt sunburnt.den face so itchy.arghhs.
train wif cin todae in e morning.
haha.was late as usual.hee.
heyy.thx fer e 'happy cookies'
haha.thankiew... i try to finish it kae.
but it wil tk quite sum time.umm.
time passes reli fast todae.
4 free periods.no cme.no cs.
e sub we dreaded e most.haha.
we were hyperin away.teeheehee.
:) so bang.den used e time to design ms tan scrapbk.
so chio lorh.hahahaha.our efforts paid off after all.hehe
gt 90 pages kae.wonder how long we wld take to gedit done.
3 absentees todae.
haik.e class so quiet wofout our class talkative ple.
esh-freak n sar.
alamak.e atmosphere nt e same lorh. :(
hope dey hurry up recover kayy.
get well soon yea???
tmr AAW...hahaha.tink its gona b real great funn.
mmuz take more pic.cos gt too many blank pgs ine bk.
wahh.so chum larhh.hayioh.
muz take those veh quiet onee.seldom tok one.haha
sabo em...
ys n jamie n e rest gonna walk arnd wif e cardboard over em.
hah.so nicee.e programme sheet on it.
hope will attract ple kayy.
yarhh.wadever it is.juz hope tmr a beautiful dae.
its oso crez open hse mah.
den muz set gd impression fer parents n P6 students.yepyep. =)
-many of us feel e need to qusetion life.sumtimes we are fortunate to find ans we seek.n sumtimes we find ourselves juz drifting endlessly,searching 4 e ans tt seem 2 constantly elude us-
sir's trng.wells.wasnt tt bad.
but juz rather tiring larhh.
he told us muz do 8 sets.
run canal.den jump over bench.crawl under table.
rowing.push-ups.den fitness corner.
almost die-ed half way thru.
n the bloody sun was fregin hot ydae.
n noo break summore.wth.
gt no partner.heh.juz a loner.
roamin abt.haha.wadever..
al2gether did 8 sets.
5 proper one.den e last 3 juz ran canal.
came baq.everyone doin cool down.
hphffff.im so dumbb.erts!
haiks.how follish can i ged.pl onli do 5 sets lorh.
stupid me lar.forever oso liddat.
sighh.juz take it as improvin my fitness lorh.
ran canal alone.mk me drift further only.hah.
yepps.wad if i dropped into e canal.
den can juz die over dere.yepp.no one nd to care.
den went home wif yx.krys.sarina.ry.n.. tt all.
ate ice cream.yeahh.
den we din wana board e train.quite packed.
sarina so cute.was lyk how cum we nv go up e train arh?
said tt onli after e door was abt to close.
mwahahaha.made all of us laugh like siao lorh.
haha.she dun like rgps.haha.nemind.its nice okie?
went home.did maths.den slept.was tired.
gt sunburnt.den face so itchy.arghhs.
train wif cin todae in e morning.
haha.was late as usual.hee.
heyy.thx fer e 'happy cookies'
haha.thankiew... i try to finish it kae.
but it wil tk quite sum time.umm.
time passes reli fast todae.
4 free periods.no cme.no cs.
e sub we dreaded e most.haha.
we were hyperin away.teeheehee.
:) so bang.den used e time to design ms tan scrapbk.
so chio lorh.hahahaha.our efforts paid off after all.hehe
gt 90 pages kae.wonder how long we wld take to gedit done.
3 absentees todae.
haik.e class so quiet wofout our class talkative ple.
esh-freak n sar.
alamak.e atmosphere nt e same lorh. :(
hope dey hurry up recover kayy.
get well soon yea???
tmr AAW...hahaha.tink its gona b real great funn.
mmuz take more pic.cos gt too many blank pgs ine bk.
wahh.so chum larhh.hayioh.
muz take those veh quiet onee.seldom tok one.haha
sabo em...
ys n jamie n e rest gonna walk arnd wif e cardboard over em.
hah.so nicee.e programme sheet on it.
hope will attract ple kayy.
yarhh.wadever it is.juz hope tmr a beautiful dae.
its oso crez open hse mah.
den muz set gd impression fer parents n P6 students.yepyep. =)
-many of us feel e need to qusetion life.sumtimes we are fortunate to find ans we seek.n sumtimes we find ourselves juz drifting endlessly,searching 4 e ans tt seem 2 constantly elude us-
the girl next door;
Wednesday, August 20, 2003
went to watch movie wif yh.cindy.yinxi.krys.
at ferst ry suppose to go one.den dad dun allow.
sighh.so rubbish lorh.n she was e one who invited me..
woahh.wadever larhh.
homerun e show itself is quite nice larh.
we watched at jp.near my plc.heehee. ;)
e show was kinda farnie n sad larhh.
den hakfway thru yx kept askin me if i was alritex.
ehh.i was perfectly fine kaee.
u dun xpect me to tok to u in e cinema rite?
yepps.tt's y i kept quiet lar.haha.
e ending of e show.haikx.gt ntg to sae..
erts!every show bound to haf a moral.hehe.
next time dun ever wanna go baq dere liao..
still rmeber. theatre 4.sit no. H 9-13.
sighh.wadever la.den din wana stay aft e show.
wanted to go baq home.so many things nt done yett.
yarhh.fine.all excuses larh.i reli din wanna malu myslef.
haik.den brought cin to mrt station.
actual fact.was runing away.
i simply wanted to leave.but no comments larh.
din wan anyone to ged e rong idea.
so stayed larhh.dey went to eat at macs.
wif jiayi n trina.uhmm.
den aft tt i left ferst lorh.
tink e others went to roam arnd.
yepps.sorry fer nt sayin byee.yeahh
was kinda bu shuang lar.
so if i stayed longer.u all wld juz complain its my fault fer daoin her.
wadever lorhs.so juz wanted to leave jp.yyahh.
walked home alone.so wad.-loner-
den juz ahem lorh.sigh.tis is reli gettin badd.
i reli dunoe wad to do or sae anymore.
muz juz feel tt we're nt meant to b.. liddat.
no use pusin us 2gether.
perhaps we're both of e same kind.
eg.north poles.den will repel upon seeing each other.
gonna let go.takin my troubles away.i wana gif upp.im sry to sae.
dun liek todae.totallie sucked.cos of MY existence.tsk.
yusheng develpoed e fotos liao.woahh.
all so chio.hahaha.reli lor.cept fer a few larhh.
haha.cos my face destroyed it.mwahahaha.
gonna gif ms tan sth special on tchers dae.
heheh.ys n others went to buy todae.
hope dey managed to ged everytg done.umm.
-running away doesnt solve problems.e wae we handled it.perhaps.its wrong-
at ferst ry suppose to go one.den dad dun allow.
sighh.so rubbish lorh.n she was e one who invited me..
woahh.wadever larhh.
homerun e show itself is quite nice larh.
we watched at jp.near my plc.heehee. ;)
e show was kinda farnie n sad larhh.
den hakfway thru yx kept askin me if i was alritex.
ehh.i was perfectly fine kaee.
u dun xpect me to tok to u in e cinema rite?
yepps.tt's y i kept quiet lar.haha.
e ending of e show.haikx.gt ntg to sae..
erts!every show bound to haf a moral.hehe.
next time dun ever wanna go baq dere liao..
still rmeber. theatre 4.sit no. H 9-13.
sighh.wadever la.den din wana stay aft e show.
wanted to go baq home.so many things nt done yett.
yarhh.fine.all excuses larh.i reli din wanna malu myslef.
haik.den brought cin to mrt station.
actual fact.was runing away.
i simply wanted to leave.but no comments larh.
din wan anyone to ged e rong idea.
so stayed larhh.dey went to eat at macs.
wif jiayi n trina.uhmm.
den aft tt i left ferst lorh.
tink e others went to roam arnd.
yepps.sorry fer nt sayin byee.yeahh
was kinda bu shuang lar.
so if i stayed longer.u all wld juz complain its my fault fer daoin her.
wadever lorhs.so juz wanted to leave jp.yyahh.
walked home alone.so wad.-loner-
den juz ahem lorh.sigh.tis is reli gettin badd.
i reli dunoe wad to do or sae anymore.
muz juz feel tt we're nt meant to b.. liddat.
no use pusin us 2gether.
perhaps we're both of e same kind.
eg.north poles.den will repel upon seeing each other.
gonna let go.takin my troubles away.i wana gif upp.im sry to sae.
dun liek todae.totallie sucked.cos of MY existence.tsk.
yusheng develpoed e fotos liao.woahh.
all so chio.hahaha.reli lor.cept fer a few larhh.
haha.cos my face destroyed it.mwahahaha.
gonna gif ms tan sth special on tchers dae.
heheh.ys n others went to buy todae.
hope dey managed to ged everytg done.umm.
-running away doesnt solve problems.e wae we handled it.perhaps.its wrong-
the girl next door;
Tuesday, August 19, 2003
common test is fianllie over!!! whee~! so bang.
it wus overall okie lar.cept ffer sci.totally sux.
din reli study.i was partly to blame.cos spent too much time on chi
wanted to do reli well kaee.sigh.but its all over.
no use broodin over it wad..yepps/exactly.
todae CIP rawks totalie
woah lorhh.heheeh.so funn.laughed like siao.
designed the poster fer art awareness wk..
hehehehe.love it sia.my grp one rawks.
but tania's one so much nicer.
dey put in lotsa effort i muz say larhh
den muz write name...
erts!! actualie did most of it abt 80% of it lorh
budden ys help me too.
thankiew.. so sweet.haha.wif me arnd.e whole thing went well right?
haha.ego-in.rubbish me larh.
oh yahh.u all dun call me tt funny name kayy.
sounds so erttss..wadever.haha
-lynny netty meanie cheeky porky-
wad the hell?haha.u all chao creative larhh.
my class design is soo superb chioo.
hahahahha.ego ego ego ego ego.love it siaa.
woahh.going crazee.hyper too much liao.
ehmm.tokin to ry on e fone nw.
sighh.she telling me nonsense.
says she wanna die.den kp cryin.
wao kao...doenoe wad to sae kaee
she wana die.siao.tsk.
haikx.den sae her mum wan her b maid.can die sia.
sae e fwenship wif krys is e end,
so negativee le.cheer up kayy.
no point thinkin so much abt it lorh.
goin orchard tmr.woahh.mum fianlly allow.bestt.
watchin homerun.wanna watch it badly.gt chane nw.
but it seems like.ry cant go.mum dun alow.
so tink we;re nt going anymore.wahhh.
wadever lar.so unlucky sumtime.
unless we go wifout her?but veh mean le..
sighsighsigh.reli doennoe wadda do.arghss
anw.tmr is krys bdae.hah.happie bdae denn.
haha.sound so reluctant but its nt lar.sincere kae.tc.
-juz can seem to understand sum ple.sigh-
it wus overall okie lar.cept ffer sci.totally sux.
din reli study.i was partly to blame.cos spent too much time on chi
wanted to do reli well kaee.sigh.but its all over.
no use broodin over it wad..yepps/exactly.
todae CIP rawks totalie
woah lorhh.heheeh.so funn.laughed like siao.
designed the poster fer art awareness wk..
hehehehe.love it sia.my grp one rawks.
but tania's one so much nicer.
dey put in lotsa effort i muz say larhh
den muz write name...
erts!! actualie did most of it abt 80% of it lorh
budden ys help me too.
thankiew.. so sweet.haha.wif me arnd.e whole thing went well right?
haha.ego-in.rubbish me larh.
oh yahh.u all dun call me tt funny name kayy.
sounds so erttss..wadever.haha
-lynny netty meanie cheeky porky-
wad the hell?haha.u all chao creative larhh.
my class design is soo superb chioo.
hahahahha.ego ego ego ego ego.love it siaa.
woahh.going crazee.hyper too much liao.
ehmm.tokin to ry on e fone nw.
sighh.she telling me nonsense.
says she wanna die.den kp cryin.
wao kao...doenoe wad to sae kaee
she wana die.siao.tsk.
haikx.den sae her mum wan her b maid.can die sia.
sae e fwenship wif krys is e end,
so negativee le.cheer up kayy.
no point thinkin so much abt it lorh.
goin orchard tmr.woahh.mum fianlly allow.bestt.
watchin homerun.wanna watch it badly.gt chane nw.
but it seems like.ry cant go.mum dun alow.
so tink we;re nt going anymore.wahhh.
wadever lar.so unlucky sumtime.
unless we go wifout her?but veh mean le..
sighsighsigh.reli doennoe wadda do.arghss
anw.tmr is krys bdae.hah.happie bdae denn.
haha.sound so reluctant but its nt lar.sincere kae.tc.
-juz can seem to understand sum ple.sigh-
the girl next door;
Sunday, August 17, 2003
yest was lyte totallie shiok.hehx.so funn. :>
jiayi was late.waited fer abt 30mins.arghx.
went qnstown.heard from hueiyee no one dere.includin farmer.
so went to orchard library to mugg.no trng..
maulated myslef 5 times.grrr.*paiseh*
yepps.worst e hp one.ahh.malu sia.
heard powerpuff girls ring tone at raffles plc.
den was lyk so many ple had same ring tone,asked jy check if it was hers.
but wasnt n it rang quite long.hmm.4
no one ans.thot who was e stupid person dun even noe its her phone.
n ahha.turned out to b ME!!! woo.so malu. *tsk*
everyone was luaghin.n yinxi started makin fun of me from den..
sir called ltr.kept sayin hello.as tho im deaf liddar.
n guess wad? tot it was my uncle kae.called him 'gugu' ahh.male agn.
passed hp to yx.said e guy was freakin me out.
tink sir heard.arghh.make everyone in train stare at me..todae juz isnt my dae..wahhh
at library.cldnt reli concentrate.wif yx arnd.no peace.she was bei-ing her tang shi.
hahax.no offence.im so shi bai.woah lor...
ate lunch at BK.den roamed arnd.den bought krys pressie.
sho chio.woahh.loveit.but tink yx dun reli lyk.hehx.
went to change.yx kept finding fault wif her clothes.
said she looked farnie.no lrhh.u look perfectly cute kaes.mebbe u nt used onli.hehe.
waited fer cindy at bus-stop.went early.scared lose our wayy.haha.in orchard..
thanks fer bringin us dere.yepp.
reached trinity christian centre.woahh.beeg place.yarrh/
gt settled down.tink saw ms ng. 1 whole row of crescentians.hmm.
hweeyi.yitien.angeline.cindy.me.yinxi.wore same colours.
white n bllue.chio sia.hahaha.-ego-
den francesca.huiyi.bernice.carolyn.shuping.evelyn.were a seat away.
one available seat.thot it was reserved for her.
musical rather nicee.shiok.cept fer certain gruesome parts.
cin told me she cldnt cum.kinda disappointed.
hmmm.some parts were abit saddening.uhm.yepp.led me into deep thots... ... ... ...
i started tinking abt every'tg.efforts were futile.
was a great chance to tok to her once agn.but yarhh.she cldnt cum.
ruined every'tg/but its not her fault.she isnt to b balmed.fate.perhaps all i can say.
recalled plenty of memories...made me tear.
was freagin dark.tot no one cld see.yet... i was noticed.
uhmm.heyy.ermm.u asked me if i wus crying thru sms.i said no ritex.
yepps.denied.mean hu wld sae yes rite? so uhmm.yeahh/
sorrie din wanna let u noe.sorry.afraid u wld ask more n WHY?
*sigh* so cold summore.almost die-ed down dere.
cindy lent me her sweater.thankiew once agn.so sweet.it kept me a lil warm tho.
tot my blood was frozen since my fingers n toes were numb.
jaws were chattering n legs were jerking.
haikx.i veh cold-blooded one.in class oso.windbreaker always wif me.yarhh.
alamak.den i started 2 ponder agn.felt isolated.
-wanted sumone to b dere 4 me always
-wanted sumone to care 4 me
-wanted sumone to lend me a shoulder
-wanted sumone to cry wif me
-wanted sumone to appear right b4 my eyes,.
juz to sae im still missing sumone up 2 tis point of time.
sumone hu stand a special place in my heart i wld nv forget.
wanna hold on to u tight,
never letting u go,
never letting history repeats itself.
wad god says.perhaps its true.
e trip to e church.seem to knock me out of my senses.
*sobz* but a real pity u werent arnd.
life is full of ups n downs.patience.tt's all i ask fer.
perhaps.things wld ged better.as time goes by.
wif sumone to guide me thru life.i'll nv go wrong.
n ehx.ry.dun tink so much kayy.
dun hate ur life.its no gd [shud b tellin myslef instead]
wadever it is.cherish ur frens.
u told me sth.i shudnt noe.reli thanks.i needed to noe tt.
made me understand things better.but well.it was on e bad side.
so perhaps.juz make me tink tt she hates me or sth.
haikx.nemind...i doenoe wadda sae.
juz thot tt.perhaps.u're one fren tt i cld trust.
4eva telling me stuff altho it may hurt me.
but still.i wanted to noe e real truth.
rather den be duanted my hundreds millions thots.
thanks lotsa.smiles.
take care alritex? n no point thinkin abt this rite nw.
u cant let tis affect u rte nw.gt CT le.yeaps.
oh yarhh.uhmm.todae Gens bdae right>?
HAPPIE BIRTHDAY!!! u're a yr older.woahh.
n uhmm.ehx cin.u asked me if i was free on Sat right?
uhh.i am larhh.budden my dad dun allow me go agn.
haikx.doenoe y lar.sorrie yarr? -seek fer ur forgiveness- hee
okies.. shall continuye muggin.rotted e hole day yest.tatz =)
-the day i was left alone to suffer.felt as tho the world has juz fallen on me-
jiayi was late.waited fer abt 30mins.arghx.
went qnstown.heard from hueiyee no one dere.includin farmer.
so went to orchard library to mugg.no trng..
maulated myslef 5 times.grrr.*paiseh*
yepps.worst e hp one.ahh.malu sia.
heard powerpuff girls ring tone at raffles plc.
den was lyk so many ple had same ring tone,asked jy check if it was hers.
but wasnt n it rang quite long.hmm.4
no one ans.thot who was e stupid person dun even noe its her phone.
n ahha.turned out to b ME!!! woo.so malu. *tsk*
everyone was luaghin.n yinxi started makin fun of me from den..
sir called ltr.kept sayin hello.as tho im deaf liddar.
n guess wad? tot it was my uncle kae.called him 'gugu' ahh.male agn.
passed hp to yx.said e guy was freakin me out.
tink sir heard.arghh.make everyone in train stare at me..todae juz isnt my dae..wahhh
at library.cldnt reli concentrate.wif yx arnd.no peace.she was bei-ing her tang shi.
hahax.no offence.im so shi bai.woah lor...
ate lunch at BK.den roamed arnd.den bought krys pressie.
sho chio.woahh.loveit.but tink yx dun reli lyk.hehx.
went to change.yx kept finding fault wif her clothes.
said she looked farnie.no lrhh.u look perfectly cute kaes.mebbe u nt used onli.hehe.
waited fer cindy at bus-stop.went early.scared lose our wayy.haha.in orchard..
thanks fer bringin us dere.yepp.
reached trinity christian centre.woahh.beeg place.yarrh/
gt settled down.tink saw ms ng. 1 whole row of crescentians.hmm.
hweeyi.yitien.angeline.cindy.me.yinxi.wore same colours.
white n bllue.chio sia.hahaha.-ego-
den francesca.huiyi.bernice.carolyn.shuping.evelyn.were a seat away.
one available seat.thot it was reserved for her.
musical rather nicee.shiok.cept fer certain gruesome parts.
cin told me she cldnt cum.kinda disappointed.
hmmm.some parts were abit saddening.uhm.yepp.led me into deep thots... ... ... ...
i started tinking abt every'tg.efforts were futile.
was a great chance to tok to her once agn.but yarhh.she cldnt cum.
ruined every'tg/but its not her fault.she isnt to b balmed.fate.perhaps all i can say.
recalled plenty of memories...made me tear.
was freagin dark.tot no one cld see.yet... i was noticed.
uhmm.heyy.ermm.u asked me if i wus crying thru sms.i said no ritex.
yepps.denied.mean hu wld sae yes rite? so uhmm.yeahh/
sorrie din wanna let u noe.sorry.afraid u wld ask more n WHY?
*sigh* so cold summore.almost die-ed down dere.
cindy lent me her sweater.thankiew once agn.so sweet.it kept me a lil warm tho.
tot my blood was frozen since my fingers n toes were numb.
jaws were chattering n legs were jerking.
haikx.i veh cold-blooded one.in class oso.windbreaker always wif me.yarhh.
alamak.den i started 2 ponder agn.felt isolated.
-wanted sumone to b dere 4 me always
-wanted sumone to care 4 me
-wanted sumone to lend me a shoulder
-wanted sumone to cry wif me
-wanted sumone to appear right b4 my eyes,.
juz to sae im still missing sumone up 2 tis point of time.
sumone hu stand a special place in my heart i wld nv forget.
wanna hold on to u tight,
never letting u go,
never letting history repeats itself.
wad god says.perhaps its true.
e trip to e church.seem to knock me out of my senses.
*sobz* but a real pity u werent arnd.
life is full of ups n downs.patience.tt's all i ask fer.
perhaps.things wld ged better.as time goes by.
wif sumone to guide me thru life.i'll nv go wrong.
n ehx.ry.dun tink so much kayy.
dun hate ur life.its no gd [shud b tellin myslef instead]
wadever it is.cherish ur frens.
u told me sth.i shudnt noe.reli thanks.i needed to noe tt.
made me understand things better.but well.it was on e bad side.
so perhaps.juz make me tink tt she hates me or sth.
haikx.nemind...i doenoe wadda sae.
juz thot tt.perhaps.u're one fren tt i cld trust.
4eva telling me stuff altho it may hurt me.
but still.i wanted to noe e real truth.
rather den be duanted my hundreds millions thots.
thanks lotsa.smiles.
take care alritex? n no point thinkin abt this rite nw.
u cant let tis affect u rte nw.gt CT le.yeaps.
oh yarhh.uhmm.todae Gens bdae right>?
HAPPIE BIRTHDAY!!! u're a yr older.woahh.
n uhmm.ehx cin.u asked me if i was free on Sat right?
uhh.i am larhh.budden my dad dun allow me go agn.
haikx.doenoe y lar.sorrie yarr? -seek fer ur forgiveness- hee
okies.. shall continuye muggin.rotted e hole day yest.tatz =)
-the day i was left alone to suffer.felt as tho the world has juz fallen on me-
the girl next door;
Friday, August 15, 2003
had eng n goeg todae.
how sucky can tt ged.
mytian.faints.
so many qns i juz cldnt rmeber e ans.
despite studying so freagin hard,
n nw.i've let myself down agn.
kept tinking abt stuff i shudnt b.sigh.
i cant help it.
dere;s bound to b a place in which i value lotsa.
n when i see each n every corner.it juz appears it my mind.
abt e bang times we shared.
a fwendship tt i treasured so muchh.
this hadta happen.
4 wks liao.gt progress.but a lil tho.
its okies.im satisfied.i cant ask fer anymore,
im no one to anyone.
i mean ntg to anyone.so wadever.
after sch.met yx.
wanted to train.she got no pe shirt.
wanted to borrow from sarina.but she sae she sweaty after bball.
so nemind.thnks anw.=smiles=
so in e end.ran canal alone.
wanted to make up fer yest.rather ji mo.
ohwells.only better.leaving me to think n drift further.
woah lorh.heex.
tmr still gt trng.haikx.
so freagin many ple nt goin le.
wth..goshh lorhh.
den after e same few pathetic souls agn.faint sia..
not fun at all wadd.
den got kind n i.doenoe if i shud goes.
n tt depends on yinxi.hahax. *winks*
haha.aha.going mad.crazee.fengg.
stayed abq after sch.mstan gave us de-briefing abt pbl.
veh disappointed abt our pbl.
said we performed below expectations.
sighh.wad am i supposed tosae??
forget abt it.boohoo. =S
hey dear girls.we haf always been a veh bang class u noe.
1C2.wadda ple expect???
teachers haf much higher expectations comapared to e rest.
we try our best in every'tg n make sure we energe as champions.
but yet...e basic quality.we're lacking.---> forgive n forget.
juz sum misunderstandings n conflicts.puts everytg up.
pardon me fer sayin all these crap.im still e chair afterall.
juz want u 2 spare me a few mins.cos im suffering far too much.
kaee.please.thankiew.
okies.i wan C2 to b baq to normal.
as united as before.
i dun wan juz to continue in this state.so pathetic.
we drifting apart.mstan can tell.she reli cann.
i wan u all to noe.i care more fer this class den myself.
hope we will b 2gether as one.fall as one.win as one.
share memories as one n everytg.
i dun like to see u ple like these.
it hurts me so much.n despite i do haf my own probs.
forgiveing i reli one major thing.
we cant juz hold grudges fer e rest of our lives?
lemme tell u.I will juz live in misery if this reli continues kae.
i wan we all to live harmoniously as a class.
going thru obstacles hand in hand.
nt letting go.
i noe its reli nt ex fer sum of ya kayy.
i experience it b4.i noe all tt is happenin.
tho in class.i may nt seem to care.4eva shoutin at u peeps.n everytg.
sorrie kae.u all suffer silently under my hands.
but once yusheng officially gets promoted.
i suppose.everytg wld b better.
im nt too sure if i've reli don emy part.to b a gd chair.
tt im nt too sure.only u.my classmates.noes.
its alritex.if u hate me or anytg.im sorry for eveytg i caused.
juz ending here.hope u can forgive me this once.
reli din wan this to happen.
sorrie kayy.take gd care of urself.
dun let this affect our unity as a class anymore.
lynette will always be dere.in times of need =)
supposed to b muggin rite nw.but cant.
kp thikin.far too much.oh no..
regret liao.goshh.one is nt suposed to regret anything.
bahh.hate my life.feel like dieing.
vanishing from this world of stress.
arghh.tian arhh.grrr.
laeving my sorrows all behind.life sux.
it reli does...woo.
my new maid arrived.qiute chio larhh.
hope my clothes dun ged burnt n everytg.
she looks decent.shud b no prob.yepps.
how sucky can tt ged.
mytian.faints.
so many qns i juz cldnt rmeber e ans.
despite studying so freagin hard,
n nw.i've let myself down agn.
kept tinking abt stuff i shudnt b.sigh.
i cant help it.
dere;s bound to b a place in which i value lotsa.
n when i see each n every corner.it juz appears it my mind.
abt e bang times we shared.
a fwendship tt i treasured so muchh.
this hadta happen.
4 wks liao.gt progress.but a lil tho.
its okies.im satisfied.i cant ask fer anymore,
im no one to anyone.
i mean ntg to anyone.so wadever.
after sch.met yx.
wanted to train.she got no pe shirt.
wanted to borrow from sarina.but she sae she sweaty after bball.
so nemind.thnks anw.=smiles=
so in e end.ran canal alone.
wanted to make up fer yest.rather ji mo.
ohwells.only better.leaving me to think n drift further.
woah lorh.heex.
tmr still gt trng.haikx.
so freagin many ple nt goin le.
wth..goshh lorhh.
den after e same few pathetic souls agn.faint sia..
not fun at all wadd.
den got kind n i.doenoe if i shud goes.
n tt depends on yinxi.hahax. *winks*
haha.aha.going mad.crazee.fengg.
stayed abq after sch.mstan gave us de-briefing abt pbl.
veh disappointed abt our pbl.
said we performed below expectations.
sighh.wad am i supposed tosae??
forget abt it.boohoo. =S
hey dear girls.we haf always been a veh bang class u noe.
1C2.wadda ple expect???
teachers haf much higher expectations comapared to e rest.
we try our best in every'tg n make sure we energe as champions.
but yet...e basic quality.we're lacking.---> forgive n forget.
juz sum misunderstandings n conflicts.puts everytg up.
pardon me fer sayin all these crap.im still e chair afterall.
juz want u 2 spare me a few mins.cos im suffering far too much.
kaee.please.thankiew.
okies.i wan C2 to b baq to normal.
as united as before.
i dun wan juz to continue in this state.so pathetic.
we drifting apart.mstan can tell.she reli cann.
i wan u all to noe.i care more fer this class den myself.
hope we will b 2gether as one.fall as one.win as one.
share memories as one n everytg.
i dun like to see u ple like these.
it hurts me so much.n despite i do haf my own probs.
forgiveing i reli one major thing.
we cant juz hold grudges fer e rest of our lives?
lemme tell u.I will juz live in misery if this reli continues kae.
i wan we all to live harmoniously as a class.
going thru obstacles hand in hand.
nt letting go.
i noe its reli nt ex fer sum of ya kayy.
i experience it b4.i noe all tt is happenin.
tho in class.i may nt seem to care.4eva shoutin at u peeps.n everytg.
sorrie kae.u all suffer silently under my hands.
but once yusheng officially gets promoted.
i suppose.everytg wld b better.
im nt too sure if i've reli don emy part.to b a gd chair.
tt im nt too sure.only u.my classmates.noes.
its alritex.if u hate me or anytg.im sorry for eveytg i caused.
juz ending here.hope u can forgive me this once.
reli din wan this to happen.
sorrie kayy.take gd care of urself.
dun let this affect our unity as a class anymore.
lynette will always be dere.in times of need =)
supposed to b muggin rite nw.but cant.
kp thikin.far too much.oh no..
regret liao.goshh.one is nt suposed to regret anything.
bahh.hate my life.feel like dieing.
vanishing from this world of stress.
arghh.tian arhh.grrr.
laeving my sorrows all behind.life sux.
it reli does...woo.
my new maid arrived.qiute chio larhh.
hope my clothes dun ged burnt n everytg.
she looks decent.shud b no prob.yepps.
the girl next door;
Tuesday, August 12, 2003
ahhh.leg hurts.boohoohoo. :(
screwd e dae up todae.woah lorh.
pbl.haha.quite fun i muz sae.yepps.
wif all those sabo-ing my fwens are superb att.
kana stunned by 101 qns.
e grps b4 me.noone asked qns.
haha.wADTHE....?
wadever.cld increase our marks sumhow.
but tt's provided we answered it correctly.
yusheng.u best larh.ask so many qns arhh..
notty notyy.stiull claim u were tryin to clear ur doubts.
oh yess.i belive lar.how can i such a nicee fwen not belive rite?hehex. *cheeky*
we did sth abt sentosa.topic seemed fabulous.
was sayin abt a theme park n qns start cumin up.
like 'wad wld happen if the attractions e gvrt tryin to build is outdated durin the process?'
my tian lor.practicallly dumfounded.like totalie
den was sayin theme park suits more for younger generation n anna asked
'wad if my grandparents like sitting roller coasters?'
hahax.cld juz faint on the spot.its not rei my concern wadd.hehe
well.dey were sayin muz sabo e chairperson.else next time no chance liao.. :(
meano!!! nv sabo ys!!! haha.tryin NOT to b bias.dun ged angry hor.hehe.
webpage.oo.screwed every'tg up agn.waoo.
backgd.haha.cld juz disappear dispite savin.make me waste $1.40 to buy i new one when it oredi provided.haha.wadever.over liao.shant brood ova it.yepps.
todaes trng sucks.haha.horrendous sia.
ple went were like so fantastically ermm. 'many'??? [being sacrastic]haha
8 of us only, n i being the chao extra person.e only sec 1.like woah lorh./tsktsk.
ms cheng went.n so did mrlin.tot he wasnt gonna turn up at ferst
since he was seldom late.but todae exceptionate.
n he was in a rather gd mood todae i guess
smiling all e way.but felt it was kinda cheeky.o well.any'tg
workout---- 110m times 10 but it turned out to b
----> 110m 6 times. 100m 4 times
he timed all cept the ferst one.goshh.slacked lotsa.
but have been trng every dae lorh.tsktsk.
den ltr made dem to 180m twice.
i happily escaped tt.hehe.woo.but i tink i wld rather do tt kae.den suffer in pain
tis is wad happened:was doing a 1 rnd jog after e 110m.
yeahh.den yx say bounce since we were all tired.
[hueiyee was pale.hope u're feeling okay.]
i juz bounce bounce bounce.den awww.arhhh.
suddenly cld juz collapsed onto e floor le.waokaooo.. =/
my thigh suddenly got cramps lorh.memories flowed thru my mind.
thot i wld nv b able to walk agn.ha.ha.ha.crapppp.
i juz fell onto e floor lyk no one bussiness n burst.
diin even noe y kae.yeahh.
perhaps e pain was juz too unbearable.n my heart wqas broken.
yeahh.so uhmm.pain kaee.not strong anymore liao.*sobsob*
tears juz like streamed down my cheeks.waoo.malu.so extreme malu.
den called mrlin for aid.i cld barely walk kae.tsk.
he happily walked over.smilin to himslef.took his own sweet time furthermore.
haah.bet he tinks he saved e dae or sth. :|
yarrh.den he juz pulled my toes.rubb here n dere.
qas if i got no feelings kae.so not painful at all wad.
as tho my legs are form of jelly? press till so hard.make my cry even more.
*paiseh* den kisha,lois,liping n joan came over.
yeahh.maluated myself agn. :(
mrlin asked me time i slept.aha.best.everyone was fantasized.esp liping n kisha.
ahaha.early bird alwaes the earliest.rubbishy me.
limped e rnd.n went baq to reest.yeahh.studied goeg n yan yu in e mean time.
waohh.achievement,clapsclaps.=)
din need to do cool down n e resrt of e workout.hehe.escaped.
but tink i rather run den to suffer in remorse n silence.
n yx was happily tokin to herself AGAIN!
hahaha.no one bothered abt ur crap.heh.np offence hor.
u were tryin to make us laugh but sad to sae.u failed.boohoo.
nvm.work hareder.sure can one.n ur reaction wldnt b slow anymore.
yepp.wo yong yuan zhi chi ni!!! haha.nonsensical.
limped all e was home.n SUM pple cldnt b bothered la.hahah.
still achin right nw.tinking away.but tryin not to ahem.yess.
mugmugmug.for all i care.
commontest is juz rnd e corner.haha
n im nt prepared at all.sighs.
tink im so gonna flung every single piece of test
like totalie.n juz rott all e wae.n leave me wif the scoldings.boohoo.
ntg goin into my head.yeahh.tinkin far to much.
wadever.nt supposed to b bothered.but well.wad can i sae?
dunoe lar.jujz let n go.let n go.forgive n forget is all i hafta sae...
life is perfect.haha.tink its life is miserable.
haikx.but nvm.muz listen to senior.cos u claim u nv give in to junior.
heehee.not true right?haha.haha. :D
yepps.take care of urslef loads.dun tink abt us juz 4 tis critical period.
yarhh. smile.as u said.heheh.
screwd e dae up todae.woah lorh.
pbl.haha.quite fun i muz sae.yepps.
wif all those sabo-ing my fwens are superb att.
kana stunned by 101 qns.
e grps b4 me.noone asked qns.
haha.wADTHE....?
wadever.cld increase our marks sumhow.
but tt's provided we answered it correctly.
yusheng.u best larh.ask so many qns arhh..
notty notyy.stiull claim u were tryin to clear ur doubts.
oh yess.i belive lar.how can i such a nicee fwen not belive rite?hehex. *cheeky*
we did sth abt sentosa.topic seemed fabulous.
was sayin abt a theme park n qns start cumin up.
like 'wad wld happen if the attractions e gvrt tryin to build is outdated durin the process?'
my tian lor.practicallly dumfounded.like totalie
den was sayin theme park suits more for younger generation n anna asked
'wad if my grandparents like sitting roller coasters?'
hahax.cld juz faint on the spot.its not rei my concern wadd.hehe
well.dey were sayin muz sabo e chairperson.else next time no chance liao.. :(
meano!!! nv sabo ys!!! haha.tryin NOT to b bias.dun ged angry hor.hehe.
webpage.oo.screwed every'tg up agn.waoo.
backgd.haha.cld juz disappear dispite savin.make me waste $1.40 to buy i new one when it oredi provided.haha.wadever.over liao.shant brood ova it.yepps.
todaes trng sucks.haha.horrendous sia.
ple went were like so fantastically ermm. 'many'??? [being sacrastic]haha
8 of us only, n i being the chao extra person.e only sec 1.like woah lorh./tsktsk.
ms cheng went.n so did mrlin.tot he wasnt gonna turn up at ferst
since he was seldom late.but todae exceptionate.
n he was in a rather gd mood todae i guess
smiling all e way.but felt it was kinda cheeky.o well.any'tg
workout---- 110m times 10 but it turned out to b
----> 110m 6 times. 100m 4 times
he timed all cept the ferst one.goshh.slacked lotsa.
but have been trng every dae lorh.tsktsk.
den ltr made dem to 180m twice.
i happily escaped tt.hehe.woo.but i tink i wld rather do tt kae.den suffer in pain
tis is wad happened:was doing a 1 rnd jog after e 110m.
yeahh.den yx say bounce since we were all tired.
[hueiyee was pale.hope u're feeling okay.]
i juz bounce bounce bounce.den awww.arhhh.
suddenly cld juz collapsed onto e floor le.waokaooo.. =/
my thigh suddenly got cramps lorh.memories flowed thru my mind.
thot i wld nv b able to walk agn.ha.ha.ha.crapppp.
i juz fell onto e floor lyk no one bussiness n burst.
diin even noe y kae.yeahh.
perhaps e pain was juz too unbearable.n my heart wqas broken.
yeahh.so uhmm.pain kaee.not strong anymore liao.*sobsob*
tears juz like streamed down my cheeks.waoo.malu.so extreme malu.
den called mrlin for aid.i cld barely walk kae.tsk.
he happily walked over.smilin to himslef.took his own sweet time furthermore.
haah.bet he tinks he saved e dae or sth. :|
yarrh.den he juz pulled my toes.rubb here n dere.
qas if i got no feelings kae.so not painful at all wad.
as tho my legs are form of jelly? press till so hard.make my cry even more.
*paiseh* den kisha,lois,liping n joan came over.
yeahh.maluated myself agn. :(
mrlin asked me time i slept.aha.best.everyone was fantasized.esp liping n kisha.
ahaha.early bird alwaes the earliest.rubbishy me.
limped e rnd.n went baq to reest.yeahh.studied goeg n yan yu in e mean time.
waohh.achievement,clapsclaps.=)
din need to do cool down n e resrt of e workout.hehe.escaped.
but tink i rather run den to suffer in remorse n silence.
n yx was happily tokin to herself AGAIN!
hahaha.no one bothered abt ur crap.heh.np offence hor.
u were tryin to make us laugh but sad to sae.u failed.boohoo.
nvm.work hareder.sure can one.n ur reaction wldnt b slow anymore.
yepp.wo yong yuan zhi chi ni!!! haha.nonsensical.
limped all e was home.n SUM pple cldnt b bothered la.hahah.
still achin right nw.tinking away.but tryin not to ahem.yess.
mugmugmug.for all i care.
commontest is juz rnd e corner.haha
n im nt prepared at all.sighs.
tink im so gonna flung every single piece of test
like totalie.n juz rott all e wae.n leave me wif the scoldings.boohoo.
ntg goin into my head.yeahh.tinkin far to much.
wadever.nt supposed to b bothered.but well.wad can i sae?
dunoe lar.jujz let n go.let n go.forgive n forget is all i hafta sae...
life is perfect.haha.tink its life is miserable.
haikx.but nvm.muz listen to senior.cos u claim u nv give in to junior.
heehee.not true right?haha.haha. :D
yepps.take care of urslef loads.dun tink abt us juz 4 tis critical period.
yarhh. smile.as u said.heheh.
the girl next door;
Sunday, August 10, 2003
went aunt hse yest...woo..so fun..a place where my troubles juz seem to disappear.
everyone dere kinda wore red n white.whee~!patrotic singaporeans.
had roti prata fr dinner.indian man drove e van here.
haah.luckily jiayi n krys not arnd.or else.e racism wld juz start agn.
imagine having to eat prata n juz prata for dinner.
haaha.so horrendous.we wanted to make oursleves.e man kinda allowed.
but oso not.contridicting.but no one knew how to flip e dough.
sculie land on each other face.
got so many liaoo.heeh.mushrooms.egg.cheese.etc.
yeahh.each person supposed o eat 3.
my tian.so many eat 1 oredi full.the prata was like not beeg at all wadd.
but well.ate 2 in e end.so full.but veh bang.
the curry so freagin hot.woahh.makes me feel as tho im not fire sia..
nvm.everyone was burning.n de fan wasnt on.so hse was liek chao stuffy?
took a drink.guess wad? pepsi twist.e only thing dey cld haf.
waolaoehx.make me tink of her agn.k.no offence.
but i rpomise yx not to tink abt it le.but its god's will.
n wad can i sae??? yeahh.juz drink it sorrowfully?
nvm...searched arnd.den found teh tarik.haha.worst.scald my tongue.bahh.
watched the nats dae parade.woo.no nice.but well.cant blame anyone.
it wasnt reli tt bad larh.appealing.yepps.
fireworks was e best part.
e min we saw it on tv.all of us ran to e canal.where u cld see it so fraking clearly.
so shiok.bang.fun.woahh.luv it.
colours so NICEE..whee.hyper till siao liao.haha.dun blame me.muz take everytg away from me wadd.
so e tortoise at her hse.waokao.blind le.one eye missing.oh my... =/
look like me.haha.shants be xrazee.but well.i am waddd.tsktsk.
after tt got this damn farnie show on 8.
haah.dunoe wads e name.watch n watch.
we laughed like madd.so stupidd.dey were supposed to pass e msg.
yeah.but acting it out.fang feng jeng [fly kit]
pass n pass.ended up like squeezinf the milk.. from..ahem..hahaa.
imagine krys was watching.i bet she wld laugh till go topsy turvy.haha.so siao.
e rest were not any betta.but only got 3 den uhmm.quite short lorh.
it was chap farnie when it came to the msg where a boy hadta pass to a girl or otherwise.
hehe.tt show kinda rawks larh.cld actuallie make me laugh after a ong while.woo.
so happy.2 mths to my b'dae. [yx reminded me]
den a mth to my cruise.woolala...bang bang bang.
mummy strike lottery.whee~!after long run.
was jumping arnd.haha.n was my car no or sth liddat.
haikx.den she was sayin im e most unluckyone.
all my numbers nv strike b4.
n i haf no one to blame cept myslef.for being so unlucky.having miserable life.bahh.
anything wldnt be fine for me juz yet.
heyy eewen arh.sorry abt my attitude on e fone yest.
bad mooding.or not so bad larh.juz din wanna tok abt it.
since it was nats dae n e prmosie i have made.yepps.
sorry.but thanks for ur concern anyways...
haha.kana scolded by tuition tcher earlier.bahh.
sae my oral chao lan.goshh.liek wad can i do?
i can speak gd chinese.all slang larh.
nvm.will try my best.i know my oral is juz arnd e corner.but u cant blame me wad..
speak eng more den chinese.but i assure u wun let u down kae.yeahh.
n im going MacRitchie later.to run of course.
yeahh.cant belive so hardworking.egoego.
haha.nemind...mux admit i have been trainin for long-d these few days.
wif yx jy n hy.yeeps.
n once mrlin is baq.grr.baq to jumps.*cries*
i dun reli like it lorr.rather run n b nobody.den jump.
but nvm.its okies.juz leave it as it is.n prove him rong sumhow.
n i think jasmine can jump further lorh.juz bcos she nv go for trail.
den cannot jump of nats.wad the hell.nemind.wadever.
okies.shall go baq to mugg.after kana scolded agn.
den muz memorise script for pbl.AHHHHH
all my part so freagin long le.but nvm lar...shall try my best.
everyone dere kinda wore red n white.whee~!patrotic singaporeans.
had roti prata fr dinner.indian man drove e van here.
haah.luckily jiayi n krys not arnd.or else.e racism wld juz start agn.
imagine having to eat prata n juz prata for dinner.
haaha.so horrendous.we wanted to make oursleves.e man kinda allowed.
but oso not.contridicting.but no one knew how to flip e dough.
sculie land on each other face.
got so many liaoo.heeh.mushrooms.egg.cheese.etc.
yeahh.each person supposed o eat 3.
my tian.so many eat 1 oredi full.the prata was like not beeg at all wadd.
but well.ate 2 in e end.so full.but veh bang.
the curry so freagin hot.woahh.makes me feel as tho im not fire sia..
nvm.everyone was burning.n de fan wasnt on.so hse was liek chao stuffy?
took a drink.guess wad? pepsi twist.e only thing dey cld haf.
waolaoehx.make me tink of her agn.k.no offence.
but i rpomise yx not to tink abt it le.but its god's will.
n wad can i sae??? yeahh.juz drink it sorrowfully?
nvm...searched arnd.den found teh tarik.haha.worst.scald my tongue.bahh.
watched the nats dae parade.woo.no nice.but well.cant blame anyone.
it wasnt reli tt bad larh.appealing.yepps.
fireworks was e best part.
e min we saw it on tv.all of us ran to e canal.where u cld see it so fraking clearly.
so shiok.bang.fun.woahh.luv it.
colours so NICEE..whee.hyper till siao liao.haha.dun blame me.muz take everytg away from me wadd.
so e tortoise at her hse.waokao.blind le.one eye missing.oh my... =/
look like me.haha.shants be xrazee.but well.i am waddd.tsktsk.
after tt got this damn farnie show on 8.
haah.dunoe wads e name.watch n watch.
we laughed like madd.so stupidd.dey were supposed to pass e msg.
yeah.but acting it out.fang feng jeng [fly kit]
pass n pass.ended up like squeezinf the milk.. from..ahem..hahaa.
imagine krys was watching.i bet she wld laugh till go topsy turvy.haha.so siao.
e rest were not any betta.but only got 3 den uhmm.quite short lorh.
it was chap farnie when it came to the msg where a boy hadta pass to a girl or otherwise.
hehe.tt show kinda rawks larh.cld actuallie make me laugh after a ong while.woo.
so happy.2 mths to my b'dae. [yx reminded me]
den a mth to my cruise.woolala...bang bang bang.
mummy strike lottery.whee~!after long run.
was jumping arnd.haha.n was my car no or sth liddat.
haikx.den she was sayin im e most unluckyone.
all my numbers nv strike b4.
n i haf no one to blame cept myslef.for being so unlucky.having miserable life.bahh.
anything wldnt be fine for me juz yet.
heyy eewen arh.sorry abt my attitude on e fone yest.
bad mooding.or not so bad larh.juz din wanna tok abt it.
since it was nats dae n e prmosie i have made.yepps.
sorry.but thanks for ur concern anyways...
haha.kana scolded by tuition tcher earlier.bahh.
sae my oral chao lan.goshh.liek wad can i do?
i can speak gd chinese.all slang larh.
nvm.will try my best.i know my oral is juz arnd e corner.but u cant blame me wad..
speak eng more den chinese.but i assure u wun let u down kae.yeahh.
n im going MacRitchie later.to run of course.
yeahh.cant belive so hardworking.egoego.
haha.nemind...mux admit i have been trainin for long-d these few days.
wif yx jy n hy.yeeps.
n once mrlin is baq.grr.baq to jumps.*cries*
i dun reli like it lorr.rather run n b nobody.den jump.
but nvm.its okies.juz leave it as it is.n prove him rong sumhow.
n i think jasmine can jump further lorh.juz bcos she nv go for trail.
den cannot jump of nats.wad the hell.nemind.wadever.
okies.shall go baq to mugg.after kana scolded agn.
den muz memorise script for pbl.AHHHHH
all my part so freagin long le.but nvm lar...shall try my best.
the girl next door;
Saturday, August 09, 2003
nats dae.oh my.times up.sobsob.
muz keep myself bz todae.
cant think much.its a happy dae afterall.
read yinxi blog.cried agn.wif i donoe wad reason???
hiakx.this fwenship wif her has put me thru so much pain.
juz simply reminded of the time when tis happened in pri sch.
in p4 wif syeila.n nw wif her.
all those daes were good either.like i feeling im experiencing right nw.
its depressing but wad can i do?
pple like to tok to me abt this matter.
sumhow i juz try to escape.or i will tear again.
im blaming no one.but jux myself.
on how all these things actuallie. happen.
n i was thinkin if i werent e one who din take e initative.
i guess.perhaps.we wld nv get to tok.
everyone is helping us.but i guess.if we dun help ourselves.
no matter how many million ppl dere are out dere.e prob will nv solve.
yeahh.guess u haf forgotten all the times we had 2gether liao lorh.
erhh.yeahh.no offence.
i reli donnoe how im taking this once agn...
on msn.we juz cldnt tok.wanted to start a topic.
but knew u wld give me the same one word ans.so oh well.nevermind.
suffering here in peace.n shall continue studyin ltr.
since afterall common test is cuminf liao...cant slack anymore.
yarhh.feel tt my classmates too noe abt all these.
esp yusheng n jamie.for i saw ry telling em.
i dun blame her larh.but dey are being good gurls.
not asking me abt this.yeahh.n pretend dey do not knoe.when actuallie dey do.
yea..juz continue liddat.appreciate it better.
class conflicts wif her.i have no idea wad to do..
i cant seem to b much of any help.
but juz waitin to ged scolded on e CIP thing on tues.
havent even handed in to ms koh.no one even brought the box.
fine larh*tskstk*
i reli donnoe wad to do..*sighs*
all this suffering in depression isnt bringin me anywhere liao.
juz wanna enter a sleep which i can let go of every'tg.
n perhaps.start a new life.n not make history repeat itself.
be sure of the fwens i make.trust it them.yet no one bother.
haikx.wadda do?can sumone tell me?
i reallie am in my wits end.abt this matter.im gonna d.i.e.
my mind is simply filled lorh.wad on earth?
juz cld put myself 2 study.but nope.ntg went in.
my mind is in a blank..crying juz seems to be the best wae out..
all i can do is juz torture my eyes.for all i care.
n tt i can be blind.n dun see anything.
sorry jaiyi.u told me not to give up.
but i dun whether there's reli any hope left...
sorrie i let u down.i let myself down too.
i reallie dun care liao.juz cant put myself 2 face her anymore.
but yeahh.still.thankiew for tt sweet sms.
n those ex-rafflesian of mine.
crescent rawks kaes.
fwenship problem.juz happened to me only.yeapp.
bit crez fault.its not as if rgps last time dun haf such prob wad.
yeahh.so all of u take care.kim arh.will try to meet up wif u all kae.
muz keep myself bz todae.
cant think much.its a happy dae afterall.
read yinxi blog.cried agn.wif i donoe wad reason???
hiakx.this fwenship wif her has put me thru so much pain.
juz simply reminded of the time when tis happened in pri sch.
in p4 wif syeila.n nw wif her.
all those daes were good either.like i feeling im experiencing right nw.
its depressing but wad can i do?
pple like to tok to me abt this matter.
sumhow i juz try to escape.or i will tear again.
im blaming no one.but jux myself.
on how all these things actuallie. happen.
n i was thinkin if i werent e one who din take e initative.
i guess.perhaps.we wld nv get to tok.
everyone is helping us.but i guess.if we dun help ourselves.
no matter how many million ppl dere are out dere.e prob will nv solve.
yeahh.guess u haf forgotten all the times we had 2gether liao lorh.
erhh.yeahh.no offence.
i reli donnoe how im taking this once agn...
on msn.we juz cldnt tok.wanted to start a topic.
but knew u wld give me the same one word ans.so oh well.nevermind.
suffering here in peace.n shall continue studyin ltr.
since afterall common test is cuminf liao...cant slack anymore.
yarhh.feel tt my classmates too noe abt all these.
esp yusheng n jamie.for i saw ry telling em.
i dun blame her larh.but dey are being good gurls.
not asking me abt this.yeahh.n pretend dey do not knoe.when actuallie dey do.
yea..juz continue liddat.appreciate it better.
class conflicts wif her.i have no idea wad to do..
i cant seem to b much of any help.
but juz waitin to ged scolded on e CIP thing on tues.
havent even handed in to ms koh.no one even brought the box.
fine larh*tskstk*
i reli donnoe wad to do..*sighs*
all this suffering in depression isnt bringin me anywhere liao.
juz wanna enter a sleep which i can let go of every'tg.
n perhaps.start a new life.n not make history repeat itself.
be sure of the fwens i make.trust it them.yet no one bother.
haikx.wadda do?can sumone tell me?
i reallie am in my wits end.abt this matter.im gonna d.i.e.
my mind is simply filled lorh.wad on earth?
juz cld put myself 2 study.but nope.ntg went in.
my mind is in a blank..crying juz seems to be the best wae out..
all i can do is juz torture my eyes.for all i care.
n tt i can be blind.n dun see anything.
sorry jaiyi.u told me not to give up.
but i dun whether there's reli any hope left...
sorrie i let u down.i let myself down too.
i reallie dun care liao.juz cant put myself 2 face her anymore.
but yeahh.still.thankiew for tt sweet sms.
n those ex-rafflesian of mine.
crescent rawks kaes.
fwenship problem.juz happened to me only.yeapp.
bit crez fault.its not as if rgps last time dun haf such prob wad.
yeahh.so all of u take care.kim arh.will try to meet up wif u all kae.
the girl next door;
Friday, August 08, 2003
ehh.e dae started rather fine but ended with a great impact.
nats dae celebration.formal part wasnt nice.stood dere n persipred like mad
sians.min i reached class.friends said i looked nicere in braids.
hah.but spent half an hr tieing it n undo it in sch agn..
was kinda hyper yeahh.so fun.abt whole class were in red n white cept fer 2 girls.
ms tan giving gotcha.bang.hehx.
concert was so-so larh.
quite interesting.saboed yusheng n ms tan fer the ms s'pore thingy.
heh.dun ged angry wasnt me hu shouted fer ur name.
luckily not me.wld b chao malu-ated.haha ;)
sing sing sing.
den dere was this part where everyone juz stood up n swayed to music.
was damn sian.but reluctantly got up
den dey kep fiddling wif my hair.till it was so messy.but nemind.
after sch..went to meet sir.not many pple were going to east coast.
stayed wif sir throughout.
ferst put bags in his car.
den rotted all e wae in malay rm..
tried tokin to u in e canteen.
ur reply 'yes' or 'i donnoe'
*sobsob* no offence kaes.
yinxi was making us tok.
fancy sitting abt 20m apart from each other???
sir made us sit in front of his tble.
talked to us.. asked if shewas still in our hearts.speechless
sat dere.silence....reli worried abt ya..
made us consolidate the 2.4km run thingy.
hahax.i stapled rongly n u put the classes rongly
n he claims our minds werent focused.yeahh.muz admit.was indeed thinkin abt u.
sir says u are more affected by tis.
but well.think i am more.cry n cry.but guess i can hide it pretty well huh?
u called me yest.we talked.and laughed.
so hyper.till cldnt sleep.n todae.tis hadta happen.
sir brought us to east coast.
yx made me sit next 2 u.but well.i wasnt obliged as i reli din mind.
we din tok.felt so extra.din know wad to sae.
afraid to tok to u n u juz replied by sayin 'yes'
i din meann it.but juz lost my sense of courageness suddenly.
looked at u...felt so uhmm.worried.i wonder y.
e min we tok every'tg seems axkward basically bcos we havent been having any gd timer 2gether
went macs.offered u fries.u din wan.said u din haf e appetite
was it bcos of me?or u reli din wanna eat?
should have juz bought a meal fer u.n u still wld hafta eat it anywae.cos everyone else had sth 2 eat.n i dun tink u wld let my $ go to e drain juz liddat rite?
dun keep starving urself.even if u din wanna eat.ur stomach needs to food.in order to survive.
was kinda hmph.bad mooding.had tis bu shuang look on my face rite?
i know.i was chao sad.tinking of whether to tok to u.
after a while juz left my seat.im sorrie.i juz wanted to refresh myslef.
but when found out tt the toilet so punee.i went baq.
sorrie for giving u all those gan ga-ness. *apologys*
din know things wld juz happen to turn out liddat.im reli sorry hor.
lunch was horrid kaes.no one toked agn.. silence...was dieing of boredom.
den yx brought yh out fer a walk.n u all came baq shortly.
n left again...
but u all came baq larhx.den yx brought me out for a walk.my turn now.
talk n talk.u presuaded my to tok to her.
i reli wanted to.i wasnt bcos i wanted to dao her kae.
i wasnt scared kae.dunnoe y i had tis feeling.
den juz burst in front of u.sorry if i had shocked u..
i reli needed to let go of myself once agn.yepps.
sir arrived shortly.and i helped him do the 2.4 thingy agn.
yeahh.we left to e fitness corner after a while lorhs.
went dere changed n every'tg.sorry for dao-ing u once agn.
yinxi.sorry hor.u match making jux din work.haha.
yx asked if u wanted to train wif us.u said ok den ltr u said u werent training.
den the veh next min i saw u wif sandra n yilin.
perhaps it was my fault.for existing.den u perhaps wld haf gone wif yinxi.
sorry hor.kept blaming myself.yeahh.
was veh depressed.picked up stones.n juz threw it into the nv ending sea.
arms hurts after yest gym workout but still.needed to let go stress u see.
bottling up every'tg doesnt help.neither does cuttin.neother does crying.
ntg helps.except if i actuallie talked to u.
jogged arnd.den went to sit at this platform.
saw the calm sea.juz wanted to jump in.n vanish from e earth.
alamak...wadever.den lay down.started into the sky.blank mind.
hot.sun was glaring at me.face itching like siao nw.sighs.
damn irritated.veh bored over dere.picked up shells n clams.
den decided to run lorh.or else can juz rott dere.bahh :|
ran wif hueiyee.put all my troubles aside for a while.
e run was rather long kaes.run all e wae to this canal.where it was liek dead end.
den ran baq on the sand.gahh.almost die-ed.haha.tiring sia.juz sweat n sweat.
hot hot hot.was burning.tot i was gonna explode kae.had stuched summore.
how bad can my dae reli go??
went baq to the platform.went to sit beside u.or else yx scold me agn.
hehx.buit it wasnt bcos of her sake.
i tot we juz neede to tok.was tryin to spark up sum kind of convo in us larh
but failed. :( sorry okies?
laid down on e platform agn.tt's the best wae to relax i suppose.
juz wanted to shout lorh.but din dare as dere were like chao many pple.
okies.finally tok to u.asked sum dumb qns i know.
sollie.ferst was how u goin home ltr.u said 'i dunnoe'
ltr asked if krys n ry patch up liao.u said 'i donnoe lar'
my tian.alomost fainted when tokin to u.no offence kayy.
i juz wanted to talk 2 u wadd.sry.
gave up.u din wanna tok.i rather u tok to yx.
u 2 looked much happier b4 i came.yepps.
im glad fer u 2.finallie tokin to each other since e start of the yr.
all thanks to me.hehx.ego ego.teeheehee.but wadever.
glad both of yer had a fabulous time.woo.
happie for the both of u.whee~!
after tt.went baq to where our bags were placed.
moody.stayed dere like wanna die.so uhm.yeahh
cindy came to tok to me.asked me if things were allritex?
cld juz sae no...pple think its fine but we btoh know its not lorh.
uhmm.yeahh.cried agn n u said i was torturing my eyes
hahax.im so sorry.i juz cldnt help it.
thanks for ur concern.u muz oso take alritex.muz tok to her larh.
i noe im to blamed tt results in this.
went to change.yeahh.den cin asked me to go to this musical thingy.
not only me lar.everyone else i think.wadeva.will try to go kae.
she n yitien were like lookin at my eyes n mouth?erts!no offence hor..
hehe. :) walked baq to e underpass down dere.
yepps.was all alone.n i tink i cld hear ux tryin to make yh tok to me
okies.u dun hafta force sumone to tok to me.yepp.we haf mouth to tok n legs to walk to each other.
we both kinda feel obliged larh.yeahh.
took e bus to city hall.teared a lil.
sorry for not going behind to sit wif u all.no mood liao.
afraid to face u after all the uhhh..
sorrie.but u came in front to tok to yx after all..
yarrh.wanted to sae byee to u when i was alightin.
but i cldnt see u lorh.idiot.god's will.
came down.not again.window was blocked.uhh?
wad the hell.but nemind.all fate.*sobsob*
hope u had a perfectly fine dinner in town.
train journey was like wad so long???
damnit.haikx.so siann.grr.
uhh.sighs.national dae is tmr.
i've let myslef down.rmreber the target i set for myself.
*sobsob*no hope liao.but still.i musnt lose confidence.
it juz takes time.2wks liao.can totallie d-i-e.
saddening moments wif u...dun ever tink i wanna go baq to east coast ever agn
but it not ur fault hor.yepps.
anw.u take gd care of ur leg alritex?
dun injure it agn hor.yeahh.
all e best in ur pbl.cum to me if u need help
i noe u havent started but time is drawing near.
can help u if u wan to.juzz approach me lorhs.
yeahh.take care. :)
nats dae celebration.formal part wasnt nice.stood dere n persipred like mad
sians.min i reached class.friends said i looked nicere in braids.
hah.but spent half an hr tieing it n undo it in sch agn..
was kinda hyper yeahh.so fun.abt whole class were in red n white cept fer 2 girls.
ms tan giving gotcha.bang.hehx.
concert was so-so larh.
quite interesting.saboed yusheng n ms tan fer the ms s'pore thingy.
heh.dun ged angry wasnt me hu shouted fer ur name.
luckily not me.wld b chao malu-ated.haha ;)
sing sing sing.
den dere was this part where everyone juz stood up n swayed to music.
was damn sian.but reluctantly got up
den dey kep fiddling wif my hair.till it was so messy.but nemind.
after sch..went to meet sir.not many pple were going to east coast.
stayed wif sir throughout.
ferst put bags in his car.
den rotted all e wae in malay rm..
tried tokin to u in e canteen.
ur reply 'yes' or 'i donnoe'
*sobsob* no offence kaes.
yinxi was making us tok.
fancy sitting abt 20m apart from each other???
sir made us sit in front of his tble.
talked to us.. asked if shewas still in our hearts.speechless
sat dere.silence....reli worried abt ya..
made us consolidate the 2.4km run thingy.
hahax.i stapled rongly n u put the classes rongly
n he claims our minds werent focused.yeahh.muz admit.was indeed thinkin abt u.
sir says u are more affected by tis.
but well.think i am more.cry n cry.but guess i can hide it pretty well huh?
u called me yest.we talked.and laughed.
so hyper.till cldnt sleep.n todae.tis hadta happen.
sir brought us to east coast.
yx made me sit next 2 u.but well.i wasnt obliged as i reli din mind.
we din tok.felt so extra.din know wad to sae.
afraid to tok to u n u juz replied by sayin 'yes'
i din meann it.but juz lost my sense of courageness suddenly.
looked at u...felt so uhmm.worried.i wonder y.
e min we tok every'tg seems axkward basically bcos we havent been having any gd timer 2gether
went macs.offered u fries.u din wan.said u din haf e appetite
was it bcos of me?or u reli din wanna eat?
should have juz bought a meal fer u.n u still wld hafta eat it anywae.cos everyone else had sth 2 eat.n i dun tink u wld let my $ go to e drain juz liddat rite?
dun keep starving urself.even if u din wanna eat.ur stomach needs to food.in order to survive.
was kinda hmph.bad mooding.had tis bu shuang look on my face rite?
i know.i was chao sad.tinking of whether to tok to u.
after a while juz left my seat.im sorrie.i juz wanted to refresh myslef.
but when found out tt the toilet so punee.i went baq.
sorrie for giving u all those gan ga-ness. *apologys*
din know things wld juz happen to turn out liddat.im reli sorry hor.
lunch was horrid kaes.no one toked agn.. silence...was dieing of boredom.
den yx brought yh out fer a walk.n u all came baq shortly.
n left again...
but u all came baq larhx.den yx brought me out for a walk.my turn now.
talk n talk.u presuaded my to tok to her.
i reli wanted to.i wasnt bcos i wanted to dao her kae.
i wasnt scared kae.dunnoe y i had tis feeling.
den juz burst in front of u.sorry if i had shocked u..
i reli needed to let go of myself once agn.yepps.
sir arrived shortly.and i helped him do the 2.4 thingy agn.
yeahh.we left to e fitness corner after a while lorhs.
went dere changed n every'tg.sorry for dao-ing u once agn.
yinxi.sorry hor.u match making jux din work.haha.
yx asked if u wanted to train wif us.u said ok den ltr u said u werent training.
den the veh next min i saw u wif sandra n yilin.
perhaps it was my fault.for existing.den u perhaps wld haf gone wif yinxi.
sorry hor.kept blaming myself.yeahh.
was veh depressed.picked up stones.n juz threw it into the nv ending sea.
arms hurts after yest gym workout but still.needed to let go stress u see.
bottling up every'tg doesnt help.neither does cuttin.neother does crying.
ntg helps.except if i actuallie talked to u.
jogged arnd.den went to sit at this platform.
saw the calm sea.juz wanted to jump in.n vanish from e earth.
alamak...wadever.den lay down.started into the sky.blank mind.
hot.sun was glaring at me.face itching like siao nw.sighs.
damn irritated.veh bored over dere.picked up shells n clams.
den decided to run lorh.or else can juz rott dere.bahh :|
ran wif hueiyee.put all my troubles aside for a while.
e run was rather long kaes.run all e wae to this canal.where it was liek dead end.
den ran baq on the sand.gahh.almost die-ed.haha.tiring sia.juz sweat n sweat.
hot hot hot.was burning.tot i was gonna explode kae.had stuched summore.
how bad can my dae reli go??
went baq to the platform.went to sit beside u.or else yx scold me agn.
hehx.buit it wasnt bcos of her sake.
i tot we juz neede to tok.was tryin to spark up sum kind of convo in us larh
but failed. :( sorry okies?
laid down on e platform agn.tt's the best wae to relax i suppose.
juz wanted to shout lorh.but din dare as dere were like chao many pple.
okies.finally tok to u.asked sum dumb qns i know.
sollie.ferst was how u goin home ltr.u said 'i dunnoe'
ltr asked if krys n ry patch up liao.u said 'i donnoe lar'
my tian.alomost fainted when tokin to u.no offence kayy.
i juz wanted to talk 2 u wadd.sry.
gave up.u din wanna tok.i rather u tok to yx.
u 2 looked much happier b4 i came.yepps.
im glad fer u 2.finallie tokin to each other since e start of the yr.
all thanks to me.hehx.ego ego.teeheehee.but wadever.
glad both of yer had a fabulous time.woo.
happie for the both of u.whee~!
after tt.went baq to where our bags were placed.
moody.stayed dere like wanna die.so uhm.yeahh
cindy came to tok to me.asked me if things were allritex?
cld juz sae no...pple think its fine but we btoh know its not lorh.
uhmm.yeahh.cried agn n u said i was torturing my eyes
hahax.im so sorry.i juz cldnt help it.
thanks for ur concern.u muz oso take alritex.muz tok to her larh.
i noe im to blamed tt results in this.
went to change.yeahh.den cin asked me to go to this musical thingy.
not only me lar.everyone else i think.wadeva.will try to go kae.
she n yitien were like lookin at my eyes n mouth?erts!no offence hor..
hehe. :) walked baq to e underpass down dere.
yepps.was all alone.n i tink i cld hear ux tryin to make yh tok to me
okies.u dun hafta force sumone to tok to me.yepp.we haf mouth to tok n legs to walk to each other.
we both kinda feel obliged larh.yeahh.
took e bus to city hall.teared a lil.
sorry for not going behind to sit wif u all.no mood liao.
afraid to face u after all the uhhh..
sorrie.but u came in front to tok to yx after all..
yarrh.wanted to sae byee to u when i was alightin.
but i cldnt see u lorh.idiot.god's will.
came down.not again.window was blocked.uhh?
wad the hell.but nemind.all fate.*sobsob*
hope u had a perfectly fine dinner in town.
train journey was like wad so long???
damnit.haikx.so siann.grr.
uhh.sighs.national dae is tmr.
i've let myslef down.rmreber the target i set for myself.
*sobsob*no hope liao.but still.i musnt lose confidence.
it juz takes time.2wks liao.can totallie d-i-e.
saddening moments wif u...dun ever tink i wanna go baq to east coast ever agn
but it not ur fault hor.yepps.
anw.u take gd care of ur leg alritex?
dun injure it agn hor.yeahh.
all e best in ur pbl.cum to me if u need help
i noe u havent started but time is drawing near.
can help u if u wan to.juzz approach me lorhs.
yeahh.take care. :)
the girl next door;
Monday, August 04, 2003
aw man.. wad a dae kaes.
start yest nite.when i started chattin wif her.
yepp.said sorry so freagin many times.
den she explained everytg.
good.yeah.said sth lyk cant patch up cos of ry.
den yeah.she wld b sad.
and she bring the damn bang chair gives in.
rather suffer den let others cry.
so shiok.yeah.sorrie larh.
i know i kept sayin fine yest.
muz admit i was veh qi when u said u din wanna he hao wif me lorh
*tsktsk* din undertsand at ferst mah
den cried from 8.30 to 10.30
till eyees were sore goshh..
yepps.
todae.not good.bad in fact.
but wasnt tt horrendous lar
i know its contridicting.
yepps.in the moring.
cried.bahh.ry cheered me up.
den krys came.said she jump wif me.
she actuallie put her leg ova e railing lorh
totallie died of heart attack i tell u.
hhaha.yeahh
okies.went baq to class.
pple said i was unusual.
so fake lorh.kept laughin.
no matter wad dey said.
yeahh.
pe--- sir nv come.so juz slacked dere.
oh yahh.yinxi jie gave me this card and bkmk.
so cute.read it.teared agn.
so shuang lorh.she reli cares.
yepps.so replied her letter.
den she find me during recess larh
toked to her at the flag post.
she started tokin abt yh
den cried.in frnt of her AGAIN!!!
wahhh.den so happedn tt ry saw.from abv
science lab.malu malu malu.
den went to eat.was starving
uhh.saw her.yepp.
sry.but dao-ed.
den ry saw me.ask me look for U
so uhh.okies.went to where u was.
only to receive a letter from u.
uhh.yeah.darent read it in frnt of classmates.
scullie veh touching agn
went toilet.did it dere.
yepp.den broke down.goshh.
u arhh.best wif ur words.yeah.
no offence hor.yeppies.
so ltr.rb said i should tok to u.
no one has ever seen u liddat b4.
said i should b the one taking to initative.
so fine.din mind.wanted to he hao anyways.
drink stall.oh my.. *paiseh*
dunoe whose idea.shake hands.
oh god.u look to one side.
n reluctuntly shook.yeah.
u look so sadd.yeah.but i look worst.hehe
yeah.
so uhmm.everyone was crowding.all ur classmates.
farrah.athiyah.ry.rb.qin ya.sam
paiseh.. aww..
den u wlked away.
chased after u.went to talk to u
apologise.asked if u were ok.den dunoe wad u said.
only heard my foot larh.no offence.yepp.
so uhmm.hands were like hangers.hookin on to each other.
waoo.heart was beatin so fast sia.
okies.veryine tried making us tok.
but well.guess i was the only one tokin most of the time.
has homec.cried.
fwens arnd me saw.
den sae the onions larh.cut till cry.heh
ehh.chinese period.ms tan nv come.
did func writing.
topic so ciao.
wrote abt u..it was abt fughtin wif a fwen.
den muz write apology letter.yeah.u came ferst to me mind.
after sch.went look for u..
yep.saw another her..
hid.din dare.after receivin her letter.
lunch wasnt gd either.
all was sitting and no tok.
pure silence.yeah
den rb was like reprimanding me to tok tok tok
hehe. ;)yeah hit me wif the plastic summore.
uhh.left after a while.
sit down dere chao awkward
went toilet.burst a lil.den came out
and to think tt cld even meet u dere
den ry gaev us a lesson.
tt i shld tok to her.
and she has to tok to me
how interesting.
yeahh.so weird feeling
left after a while.cldnt stand it.
yeah.hatta go sgh afterall
so walked.all alone.felt lonely.
tot abt todae.so ehh.scary.
aftre a while.heard sumone calling me.
looked baq.ry jas and yh
waoo...kaoo..so sweet of them
fancy runig all e wae from sch to mrt.
so freagin touched sia.
dey gave excuse sayin e drinks dere was better
but obviously e lie was hidden in em
teared a lil.dun wan em to see.
was so touched kae.wadcha call TRUE FWENS!
whoseever idea wasiit.yeah.luv ya.
waited fer em to buy drink.
u offered h2o to me.
altho i din reli liked it.
drank it.
fer ur sake.but whoever who actuallie piad fer it
thanks a trilion
u all so nicee!!!
accompany me all thr wae to outram
oh my.,. so gan dong lehh..
:) greatest fwens i ever met.
backbone appt.
13 degrees curved..
ahhhhhhhhhhhh.dammit!
hopw it doesnt worsen.else muz wear braces.
so not ncie liao.. bahh. :(
heyy girll..
uhmm.reli miss u too.
i not evh sure if we're okies.
but as u say.we cant b selfish.
yeahh.will let ry go wif krys den i go wif u, happie?
but i may not b able to promise tt u know.
see u.juz feel ike tokin to u lorh.
so uhm.tt is sorta wad happen rite
yeahh.den u juz keep on sayin yeah yeah yeah
till i got no comments lorh..
look at u... *sob*
nv seen u liddat b4 le
u was on e verge of tears i cld tell
u din let it out.
unlike me.cry in frnt of u..
*malu malu malu*
wadever... heyy.
*sigh* ermm.
spare a tot from em..
kae.i will.
din know i was liddat.
no one expected me to cry..
yeahh.muz admit tt u know..
i was a reli strong gurl once.
but e impact i juz so great these few days.
no one believed kae
but fine.. at least i knoe sumone who reli cares..
yeah.n its YOU!
emm.tmr i tok to u agn ok?
den u cant dao me anymore....
harhar..
u reli okay anot?
dun feel bad liao larhh.
im so sorry dear...
din mean it lorhx.
yepps.now everyone knows lorh
june, miaoqun, cindy..
ahh all outsiders lehh.
bahh.nvm..
but still arhh.
this feeling still not good leh.
still feel depressed n sad le.
so i suposed we are not 2gether yet
n tmr if i tok to u arh
girl ahh.u muz at least sae sth kae.
dun liddat liao lorhh.
make me oso veh nan shou leh.
yepp.i know u understand kaes.
hiakx.yeahh.
dun tear for me liao lor..
yeahh.yeahh.
u have a special place in my heart..
and it will alwaes remain..
so now.. we think abt how to solve ry n krys prob 2gether kae
as one whole.
we're so not gonna b separated liao..
so smarty pants..
expected it to happen if i reli do patch up wif ya..
sorrie larh.n dear arh
i cant accept the car du gave me todae,
it doesnt belong to me at all.
its fer u!!!
so treasure it.
like i i treasured my friendship wif ya..
uh-huhx.u will b lettin her down.yeah
so uhmm.yeahh/will return ya.tt for sure..
missing u 4eva.
please la.u muz oso b strong kae.
we both make a deal not to cry anymore liao k?
i try u try.
cheer up kayy.dun cry liao.
it hurts to see u liddat
long long face everydae in sch
so listless lorh..
yepps.
luving u alwaes.
missing u alwaes.
ah ma will 4eva b dere.
yepps.for u only..
hahaaa.muaks. :P
start yest nite.when i started chattin wif her.
yepp.said sorry so freagin many times.
den she explained everytg.
good.yeah.said sth lyk cant patch up cos of ry.
den yeah.she wld b sad.
and she bring the damn bang chair gives in.
rather suffer den let others cry.
so shiok.yeah.sorrie larh.
i know i kept sayin fine yest.
muz admit i was veh qi when u said u din wanna he hao wif me lorh
*tsktsk* din undertsand at ferst mah
den cried from 8.30 to 10.30
till eyees were sore goshh..
yepps.
todae.not good.bad in fact.
but wasnt tt horrendous lar
i know its contridicting.
yepps.in the moring.
cried.bahh.ry cheered me up.
den krys came.said she jump wif me.
she actuallie put her leg ova e railing lorh
totallie died of heart attack i tell u.
hhaha.yeahh
okies.went baq to class.
pple said i was unusual.
so fake lorh.kept laughin.
no matter wad dey said.
yeahh.
pe--- sir nv come.so juz slacked dere.
oh yahh.yinxi jie gave me this card and bkmk.
so cute.read it.teared agn.
so shuang lorh.she reli cares.
yepps.so replied her letter.
den she find me during recess larh
toked to her at the flag post.
she started tokin abt yh
den cried.in frnt of her AGAIN!!!
wahhh.den so happedn tt ry saw.from abv
science lab.malu malu malu.
den went to eat.was starving
uhh.saw her.yepp.
sry.but dao-ed.
den ry saw me.ask me look for U
so uhh.okies.went to where u was.
only to receive a letter from u.
uhh.yeah.darent read it in frnt of classmates.
scullie veh touching agn
went toilet.did it dere.
yepp.den broke down.goshh.
u arhh.best wif ur words.yeah.
no offence hor.yeppies.
so ltr.rb said i should tok to u.
no one has ever seen u liddat b4.
said i should b the one taking to initative.
so fine.din mind.wanted to he hao anyways.
drink stall.oh my.. *paiseh*
dunoe whose idea.shake hands.
oh god.u look to one side.
n reluctuntly shook.yeah.
u look so sadd.yeah.but i look worst.hehe
yeah.
so uhmm.everyone was crowding.all ur classmates.
farrah.athiyah.ry.rb.qin ya.sam
paiseh.. aww..
den u wlked away.
chased after u.went to talk to u
apologise.asked if u were ok.den dunoe wad u said.
only heard my foot larh.no offence.yepp.
so uhmm.hands were like hangers.hookin on to each other.
waoo.heart was beatin so fast sia.
okies.veryine tried making us tok.
but well.guess i was the only one tokin most of the time.
has homec.cried.
fwens arnd me saw.
den sae the onions larh.cut till cry.heh
ehh.chinese period.ms tan nv come.
did func writing.
topic so ciao.
wrote abt u..it was abt fughtin wif a fwen.
den muz write apology letter.yeah.u came ferst to me mind.
after sch.went look for u..
yep.saw another her..
hid.din dare.after receivin her letter.
lunch wasnt gd either.
all was sitting and no tok.
pure silence.yeah
den rb was like reprimanding me to tok tok tok
hehe. ;)yeah hit me wif the plastic summore.
uhh.left after a while.
sit down dere chao awkward
went toilet.burst a lil.den came out
and to think tt cld even meet u dere
den ry gaev us a lesson.
tt i shld tok to her.
and she has to tok to me
how interesting.
yeahh.so weird feeling
left after a while.cldnt stand it.
yeah.hatta go sgh afterall
so walked.all alone.felt lonely.
tot abt todae.so ehh.scary.
aftre a while.heard sumone calling me.
looked baq.ry jas and yh
waoo...kaoo..so sweet of them
fancy runig all e wae from sch to mrt.
so freagin touched sia.
dey gave excuse sayin e drinks dere was better
but obviously e lie was hidden in em
teared a lil.dun wan em to see.
was so touched kae.wadcha call TRUE FWENS!
whoseever idea wasiit.yeah.luv ya.
waited fer em to buy drink.
u offered h2o to me.
altho i din reli liked it.
drank it.
fer ur sake.but whoever who actuallie piad fer it
thanks a trilion
u all so nicee!!!
accompany me all thr wae to outram
oh my.,. so gan dong lehh..
:) greatest fwens i ever met.
backbone appt.
13 degrees curved..
ahhhhhhhhhhhh.dammit!
hopw it doesnt worsen.else muz wear braces.
so not ncie liao.. bahh. :(
heyy girll..
uhmm.reli miss u too.
i not evh sure if we're okies.
but as u say.we cant b selfish.
yeahh.will let ry go wif krys den i go wif u, happie?
but i may not b able to promise tt u know.
see u.juz feel ike tokin to u lorh.
so uhm.tt is sorta wad happen rite
yeahh.den u juz keep on sayin yeah yeah yeah
till i got no comments lorh..
look at u... *sob*
nv seen u liddat b4 le
u was on e verge of tears i cld tell
u din let it out.
unlike me.cry in frnt of u..
*malu malu malu*
wadever... heyy.
*sigh* ermm.
spare a tot from em..
kae.i will.
din know i was liddat.
no one expected me to cry..
yeahh.muz admit tt u know..
i was a reli strong gurl once.
but e impact i juz so great these few days.
no one believed kae
but fine.. at least i knoe sumone who reli cares..
yeah.n its YOU!
emm.tmr i tok to u agn ok?
den u cant dao me anymore....
harhar..
u reli okay anot?
dun feel bad liao larhh.
im so sorry dear...
din mean it lorhx.
yepps.now everyone knows lorh
june, miaoqun, cindy..
ahh all outsiders lehh.
bahh.nvm..
but still arhh.
this feeling still not good leh.
still feel depressed n sad le.
so i suposed we are not 2gether yet
n tmr if i tok to u arh
girl ahh.u muz at least sae sth kae.
dun liddat liao lorhh.
make me oso veh nan shou leh.
yepp.i know u understand kaes.
hiakx.yeahh.
dun tear for me liao lor..
yeahh.yeahh.
u have a special place in my heart..
and it will alwaes remain..
so now.. we think abt how to solve ry n krys prob 2gether kae
as one whole.
we're so not gonna b separated liao..
so smarty pants..
expected it to happen if i reli do patch up wif ya..
sorrie larh.n dear arh
i cant accept the car du gave me todae,
it doesnt belong to me at all.
its fer u!!!
so treasure it.
like i i treasured my friendship wif ya..
uh-huhx.u will b lettin her down.yeah
so uhmm.yeahh/will return ya.tt for sure..
missing u 4eva.
please la.u muz oso b strong kae.
we both make a deal not to cry anymore liao k?
i try u try.
cheer up kayy.dun cry liao.
it hurts to see u liddat
long long face everydae in sch
so listless lorh..
yepps.
luving u alwaes.
missing u alwaes.
ah ma will 4eva b dere.
yepps.for u only..
hahaaa.muaks. :P
the girl next door;
Sunday, August 03, 2003
oh my...
like how saddening can this eva ged..
sobsob.
she so cute n sweet.
even wrote down all the great times we had together
aww.i missed it too.
i reli did.
tearing agn fer u.
everytimw i read ur entry.
its juz so touching u know.
u make it seem as tho u're reli losing me
but u're not kaes.
made up my mind.
shall tok to u some how.
lemme b the one who take the initative yeah.
we both are afraid.yeahh.i agree
but i cant let this continue
as we both live in tormented lives
i reli hope tis wld come to an end u knoe.
REallie!!!
*sighs*
i miss u loads.
abt all those times we spent 2gether
it was rellie fantastic.
hope my dreams will come true ever agn
i miss it.alot!!!!
juz found out.
we both are veh sentimental
we share so many things in common
n yet.
this thing had to happen
like y on earth???
did god choose us.
im reli apologise.i reli do
are we both forgiving each other once agn
if u're willing,
i will sure to talk to u.
yepps.i promise kaee.
ur entry juz so depressing.
we're not going to part from each other u noe.
its juz tt.sumhow..
we din talk to each other.
ever since mondae.
u knoe y..
i dun understamd at all..
girl ah girl.
lets put every'tg behind us kae.
i once tried not to cry.
but i cant..
juz cant....
i need u lotsa.lotsa.
so.. y dun we patch up.
we juz take it as tho ntg has happen ok?
i know its my fault
i know this will b hard
its juz an obstacle.
to rpove how strong our fwenship is.
so.. we muz let others noe.
they are wrong.so uhmm.
lets be baq 2gether as one kaee?
puh-please.
i wanna train wif u once agn.
n not dao u ever agn..
im getting reli impatient u knoe.
i know we both can go thru this.
all together.so.uhmm.
please.let us give each other another chance kaes.
yepps.miss u girl.
ah ma will always b dere fer u no matter wad
like how saddening can this eva ged..
sobsob.
she so cute n sweet.
even wrote down all the great times we had together
aww.i missed it too.
i reli did.
tearing agn fer u.
everytimw i read ur entry.
its juz so touching u know.
u make it seem as tho u're reli losing me
but u're not kaes.
made up my mind.
shall tok to u some how.
lemme b the one who take the initative yeah.
we both are afraid.yeahh.i agree
but i cant let this continue
as we both live in tormented lives
i reli hope tis wld come to an end u knoe.
REallie!!!
*sighs*
i miss u loads.
abt all those times we spent 2gether
it was rellie fantastic.
hope my dreams will come true ever agn
i miss it.alot!!!!
juz found out.
we both are veh sentimental
we share so many things in common
n yet.
this thing had to happen
like y on earth???
did god choose us.
im reli apologise.i reli do
are we both forgiving each other once agn
if u're willing,
i will sure to talk to u.
yepps.i promise kaee.
ur entry juz so depressing.
we're not going to part from each other u noe.
its juz tt.sumhow..
we din talk to each other.
ever since mondae.
u knoe y..
i dun understamd at all..
girl ah girl.
lets put every'tg behind us kae.
i once tried not to cry.
but i cant..
juz cant....
i need u lotsa.lotsa.
so.. y dun we patch up.
we juz take it as tho ntg has happen ok?
i know its my fault
i know this will b hard
its juz an obstacle.
to rpove how strong our fwenship is.
so.. we muz let others noe.
they are wrong.so uhmm.
lets be baq 2gether as one kaee?
puh-please.
i wanna train wif u once agn.
n not dao u ever agn..
im getting reli impatient u knoe.
i know we both can go thru this.
all together.so.uhmm.
please.let us give each other another chance kaes.
yepps.miss u girl.
ah ma will always b dere fer u no matter wad
the girl next door;
Saturday, August 02, 2003
read yh blog
oh my... how sweet can it be.
thanks dear.perhaps i reli needed it
yeahh.so touchy kayy.
next time promise u dun sae those stuff
read it n broke into tears'
wonder y?
summore on the fone with yx leh
*paiseh* im juz so emtional.
but anw.u are a great fwen
i haf not forgotten u at all.
i oso miss the great times we haf together
iZzit reli bcos of HER tt we broke up?
uh?hope we can b 2gether once agn.
sorrie kaex.i din mean to go wif her larh
juz tt she too needs fwens larh
so...if i continue to b wif her.and tok to her
am i right to sae u not gonna talk to me?
i reli hope this wld never happen kae.
cant i be fwens wif the both of u?
wadever it is.hope to b baq wif u.
u told me to b strong
but i juz cant help it anymore.
u being wae to nice girl.
juz broke into tears when i read the entry.
it reli from the bottom of ur heart
so touching.den read it over n over agn
felt the impact greater.
seems as tho we're drifting apart.
but we hold each other tight.
n make sure i dun lose u eva again... ...
i miss u too!!!
cry and cry and cry.
my eyes all red
n so are my cheeks and nose (sunburnt)
look like tomato.
but it all worth it.reallie.it is.
for you, my friend.
please dun tink tt i dun care abt u nemore.
i still do.i reli tink abt u dae n nite.
seriously.so hope things go well.
n soon.we're b baq.2gether as one.
i give myself till national dae to get this done.
but im not sure if i can be.so....
*sobsob*
wonder how much more tears i have left to go.
muz say cried so much.
juz locked myslef in my rm and sobbb...
wifout letin anyone know.
dun wish to maluate myself any further.
-iim sorry 4 e things i did
for ur teardrops over words i said
can u forgive me n open ur heart once agn
its true i mean it
from e bottom of my heart
it's true.wifout u i wld fall apart
wadeva happens i know tt i was wrong
can u believe me mebbe its true im wrong
i'll do anything to make up fer u
so please understand
open ur heart once agn-
[-i know we haf our problems every now n den
but one its fixed, our fwenship is better ten times
n i want u to noe tt i truly care
even in fights when i sae things tt arent fair-]
oh my... how sweet can it be.
thanks dear.perhaps i reli needed it
yeahh.so touchy kayy.
next time promise u dun sae those stuff
read it n broke into tears'
wonder y?
summore on the fone with yx leh
*paiseh* im juz so emtional.
but anw.u are a great fwen
i haf not forgotten u at all.
i oso miss the great times we haf together
iZzit reli bcos of HER tt we broke up?
uh?hope we can b 2gether once agn.
sorrie kaex.i din mean to go wif her larh
juz tt she too needs fwens larh
so...if i continue to b wif her.and tok to her
am i right to sae u not gonna talk to me?
i reli hope this wld never happen kae.
cant i be fwens wif the both of u?
wadever it is.hope to b baq wif u.
u told me to b strong
but i juz cant help it anymore.
u being wae to nice girl.
juz broke into tears when i read the entry.
it reli from the bottom of ur heart
so touching.den read it over n over agn
felt the impact greater.
seems as tho we're drifting apart.
but we hold each other tight.
n make sure i dun lose u eva again... ...
i miss u too!!!
cry and cry and cry.
my eyes all red
n so are my cheeks and nose (sunburnt)
look like tomato.
but it all worth it.reallie.it is.
for you, my friend.
please dun tink tt i dun care abt u nemore.
i still do.i reli tink abt u dae n nite.
seriously.so hope things go well.
n soon.we're b baq.2gether as one.
i give myself till national dae to get this done.
but im not sure if i can be.so....
*sobsob*
wonder how much more tears i have left to go.
muz say cried so much.
juz locked myslef in my rm and sobbb...
wifout letin anyone know.
dun wish to maluate myself any further.
-iim sorry 4 e things i did
for ur teardrops over words i said
can u forgive me n open ur heart once agn
its true i mean it
from e bottom of my heart
it's true.wifout u i wld fall apart
wadeva happens i know tt i was wrong
can u believe me mebbe its true im wrong
i'll do anything to make up fer u
so please understand
open ur heart once agn-
[-i know we haf our problems every now n den
but one its fixed, our fwenship is better ten times
n i want u to noe tt i truly care
even in fights when i sae things tt arent fair-]
the girl next door;
havent been updating lately
dumb com of mine spoilt
den its new n keyboard went bonkers
sum greagin many things happen
reli in delimma dunnoe how to solve it le
=sighs=
life totasllie sucked.full time
ntg has gone in my wae
ntg at all
my heart is broken
shattering into pieces
yet no one even cares
friends say i look normal
but juz to let u know
im hiding.all inside me
cant afford to let it out.sorry
exploded twice this wk.
felt maluated.but wel.wad can i do?
cant control my emotions any longer
my days arent fine
perhaps i was a veh notty person in my previos life
so i guess now is my retribution la
so unfairbut well.i live wif it
my eyes are tearing
and so is my heart
pple asked my if i haf burst?
but i smiled and denied.
not knowin wadda sae
slacked lotsa.
teachers noticed.did badly in my test.
reason being...i wasnt payin much attention
y?y?y?
i din expect this to happedn at all
n yet...it reli did
i juz cant understand
y cant i juz out every'tg behind me
and thake it as tho ntg has happened at all
n be sum kind of emtionless creature
hu doesnt bother at all
immune to all those feelings of mine
or wadsoever
if i was in heaven
perhaps it wld be better
for i know everyone has feelings too!
shouldnt i juz give it a try??? :(
haikx.damn depressed le.
i dunnoe if its my fault
tt all these misunderstandings happened
hey gurl.rellie sorry kae
lets tke it as tho its mine
cos i sorta feel ratehr guilty u noe.
we dao each other each time we see.
for wad?no answers..
well.i muz admit.i was the one who started it lar
yepps.for making u ....
uhh.sorrie kaex
i feel very uneasy tt u arent by my side anymore
thats the truth.im not lying.
i wish to patch up.and hope u do too.
i apologise for all the wrongdoings kayy.
this feeling is gross!!!horrendous/
cant take it anymore.
wish u understood.
at track todae.
it was relli awkward.
look at u.u look at me.
ntg came out of my mouth
was afraid...offend u once agn
cant find to chance to juz say every'tg out to u.
in a go.. *sobsob*
u reallie mean alot to me.
im not joking.
tried to make it seem as tho ntg happened
but cant.perhaps juz hafta accept the fact
see u wif ur clique.
smiles all dae.
well.mebbe u are keeping it to urslef.
jzu like me.so tt no one knows.
and no one cares.
=sigh=hope u are feeling okies.
i cant understand how this thingy even happen in the ferst place
ot juz too sudden
suddenly we are not toking to each other
ask ur classmates everydae.
abt wads wrong
and i tink..we both misunderstood each other
during trng.i act dao.
wanetd to try tokin to u
but din haf e guts.altho many fwens were helping us.
yeahh.so how?
every time we passed each other.
i will lookj at the grnd.
darent see ur face.or rather ur eyes.
haikx.y the hell is this happenin
so freagin nan shou leh
going to b a wk when thsi 'fight' started
but i hope it will end.ike now!
it feels terrible in me.yet no one understands me well enuff
sorrie girl.reli din mean it.
cld i ask for ur forgiveness.juz once again.
i swear i wldnt let this kinda thing happen agn kae
i know u dun treat me as a fwen.or even an ah ma anymore.
but jzu to let u know.
YOU will always be my dearest granddaughter
now and 4eva.n even my bestest fwen.
love ya loads. take care alritex.
if u dun wanna patch up.den so b it.
juz let me suffer in silence.
but u muz still live happily.im sure u wld.
yepps.
*sobsob*
posting this entry wif tears
wad the ....???
=sigh= hate this feelin
hate my life.
hope it wld juz end here.
a totalile masked me in sch
='(
classmates of mine.
u all rawk.yeahh.thnks fer ur understanding
dun ask me abt this.
i know i hide this well enuff.
smiles with u all dae.
u bring joy n laughter to my life.
thanks a trillion!!!
dumb com of mine spoilt
den its new n keyboard went bonkers
sum greagin many things happen
reli in delimma dunnoe how to solve it le
=sighs=
life totasllie sucked.full time
ntg has gone in my wae
ntg at all
my heart is broken
shattering into pieces
yet no one even cares
friends say i look normal
but juz to let u know
im hiding.all inside me
cant afford to let it out.sorry
exploded twice this wk.
felt maluated.but wel.wad can i do?
cant control my emotions any longer
my days arent fine
perhaps i was a veh notty person in my previos life
so i guess now is my retribution la
so unfairbut well.i live wif it
my eyes are tearing
and so is my heart
pple asked my if i haf burst?
but i smiled and denied.
not knowin wadda sae
slacked lotsa.
teachers noticed.did badly in my test.
reason being...i wasnt payin much attention
y?y?y?
i din expect this to happedn at all
n yet...it reli did
i juz cant understand
y cant i juz out every'tg behind me
and thake it as tho ntg has happened at all
n be sum kind of emtionless creature
hu doesnt bother at all
immune to all those feelings of mine
or wadsoever
if i was in heaven
perhaps it wld be better
for i know everyone has feelings too!
shouldnt i juz give it a try??? :(
haikx.damn depressed le.
i dunnoe if its my fault
tt all these misunderstandings happened
hey gurl.rellie sorry kae
lets tke it as tho its mine
cos i sorta feel ratehr guilty u noe.
we dao each other each time we see.
for wad?no answers..
well.i muz admit.i was the one who started it lar
yepps.for making u ....
uhh.sorrie kaex
i feel very uneasy tt u arent by my side anymore
thats the truth.im not lying.
i wish to patch up.and hope u do too.
i apologise for all the wrongdoings kayy.
this feeling is gross!!!horrendous/
cant take it anymore.
wish u understood.
at track todae.
it was relli awkward.
look at u.u look at me.
ntg came out of my mouth
was afraid...offend u once agn
cant find to chance to juz say every'tg out to u.
in a go.. *sobsob*
u reallie mean alot to me.
im not joking.
tried to make it seem as tho ntg happened
but cant.perhaps juz hafta accept the fact
see u wif ur clique.
smiles all dae.
well.mebbe u are keeping it to urslef.
jzu like me.so tt no one knows.
and no one cares.
=sigh=hope u are feeling okies.
i cant understand how this thingy even happen in the ferst place
ot juz too sudden
suddenly we are not toking to each other
ask ur classmates everydae.
abt wads wrong
and i tink..we both misunderstood each other
during trng.i act dao.
wanetd to try tokin to u
but din haf e guts.altho many fwens were helping us.
yeahh.so how?
every time we passed each other.
i will lookj at the grnd.
darent see ur face.or rather ur eyes.
haikx.y the hell is this happenin
so freagin nan shou leh
going to b a wk when thsi 'fight' started
but i hope it will end.ike now!
it feels terrible in me.yet no one understands me well enuff
sorrie girl.reli din mean it.
cld i ask for ur forgiveness.juz once again.
i swear i wldnt let this kinda thing happen agn kae
i know u dun treat me as a fwen.or even an ah ma anymore.
but jzu to let u know.
YOU will always be my dearest granddaughter
now and 4eva.n even my bestest fwen.
love ya loads. take care alritex.
if u dun wanna patch up.den so b it.
juz let me suffer in silence.
but u muz still live happily.im sure u wld.
yepps.
*sobsob*
posting this entry wif tears
wad the ....???
=sigh= hate this feelin
hate my life.
hope it wld juz end here.
a totalile masked me in sch
='(
classmates of mine.
u all rawk.yeahh.thnks fer ur understanding
dun ask me abt this.
i know i hide this well enuff.
smiles with u all dae.
u bring joy n laughter to my life.
thanks a trillion!!!
the girl next door;
LYNETTE ♥
091090
CRESCENT
NJC
07S23
LINKS
4C1
07S23
SOLARIS
aaron
alwyn
amanda goh
amy
andre
ashwyn
benjamin
cindy chan
ethel
grace
jade
jamie
janeen
jiahui
joshua
justin
kahswee
marcus
melissa wong
mervyn
ming xuan
nicole ee
ningxin
qiulin
rachel yeo
shalom
siying
sufan
thomas
tsereuy
usarin
vanessa
vivian
wendy
xinru
yihui
yiyan
yongjian
yujia
yvonne
ARCHIVES
June 2003
July 2003
August 2003
September 2003
October 2003
November 2003
December 2003
January 2004
February 2004
March 2004
April 2004
May 2004
June 2004
July 2004
August 2004
September 2004
October 2004
November 2004
December 2004
January 2005
February 2005
March 2005
April 2005
May 2005
June 2005
July 2005
August 2005
September 2005
October 2005
November 2005
December 2005
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
CREDITS
layout: ineedahugandoh;
Images: #
brushes: ##